Archives for 2013

Catherine is a first time momma to a rambunctious toddler. When she isn’t soaking up all that motherhood has to offer, you can find her blogging over at Plunged in Debt where she chronicles her and her husbands journey out of debt. You can also follow her on Twitter.

Lifestyle Check List

December 16, 2013 | Leave a Comment

Life can get so busy and so full on that we often forget about putting everything into order ready for any unfortunate circumstances, or even when we pass on. Too often we claim we can’t afford to seek outside help, or we simply don’t have enough time, and yet, as asked by Saga when discussing your financial future, can you afford to put it off? When you consider how much we all worry about our finances, it makes perfect sense to seek out seasoned, professional help in order to settle those worries.

Make Sure You’re Prepared for the Future

As expected for any lifestyle check list, drawing up a Will is possibly the most important and crucial move you can make in putting your estate and assets into order. Considering that almost three out of five people won’t bother writing a Will, it’s now more vital than ever to make sure that your money and belongings go to the people you want them to go to. Furthermore, once you’ve drawn up your Will make sure to keep it up to date, although this might sound tedious, it’ll prevent any unpleasantness after you’ve gone – divorce, marriage, children and various other circumstances which can throw a spanner in the works if you don’t keep on top of your legal documentation. If you’re in need of help Saga is on hand to offer sound advice whatever your query.

Don’t Wait For Tomorrow What You Can Do Today

As well as Saga Legal allowing you to take out a Will, not to mention their other services such as insurance and health, you can also take this opportunity to put smaller, less legally orientated plans into action, such as finishing off any DIY projects you’ve been putting off. Just as we put off drawing up legal documents, we also put off various home improvements, because we feel we don’t have the time or the money, and yet these are all things that, once sorted, will leave you with a relatively easy and stress free means of keeping on top of your assets and estate.

Whatever you decide to organize and put on your check list, make sure you take the time to seek professional help from respected sources, with the right help you’ll find that the whole process speeds up and gets sorted a lot quicker.

Brian is the founder of Kids Ain’t Cheap and is now sharing his journey through parenthood.

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How to Handle a Divorce and Maintain Your Kids’ Well-Being

December 15, 2013 | Leave a Comment

Divorce and separation are, without a doubt, difficult situations. This is even truer if you have children.

Divorce is a major shakeup in the lives of children because it doesn’t just dissolve a marriage but it also fundamentally changes the shape of our families. When you are going through a divorce, it is your job as a parent to guide your children through this period of their lives with the least amount of emotional scars and psychic wounds as possible. There is quite a bit that you can do, whether you have the cooperation of the other parent or not, to protect your children’s well-being.

Keep Communication Open

Don’t lie to your kids by giving them false hope or try to make your co-parent look bad. Be truthful but keep information age appropriate. Remember that as your children get older they may have new questions or concerns about their relationship with you and the other parent. Be sure that they know they can come to you at any time.

Give Lots of Reassurance

Remind your children that you love them, and that the other parent loves them, even if you can’t make a relationship work with your ex-spouse. Young children, especially, have a difficult time articulating their emotions. Help them by acknowledging their feelings even if they can’t name them.

Physical touch, such as giving hugs, relieves stress in children. Older children that receive regular physical contact are reportedly happier and have fewer behavioral problems. Everyone benefits from regular human contact, adults see the benefit of lowered blood pressure and better anxiety management. So be sure to show affection and hug your children.

Keep Routines

Routines are important for children. Predictability in their day to day life helps them understand and learn about the world around them. When children have routines, they feel safer and more in control of their lives. Managing change can be difficult for children, especially when large changes are brought on them suddenly.

Whenever possible, keep routines the same. Divorce creates tremendous change. Be consistent and stick to schedules for everyone’s sake. Having a familiar routines cuts down on stress levels.

Keep Adult Problems to Yourselves

“Don’t argue in front of the children” is pretty standard advice for any family but it has to go double when it comes to divorced families. Remember your co-parent is still your child’s family and always will be. Keep the details of the divorce between you and your ex.

Aim for Cooperation

When a divorce is contentious, it can be hard to bend. Hiring a child custody lawyer can sometimes be the most civil thing to do when your co-parent is uncooperative or determined to make life difficult. Learn how to tactfully set boundaries, but at the same time, be prepared to pick your battles.

If your ex is willing, consider attending co-parenting classes or at least trying to work past feelings of betrayal or mistrust that might follow a divorce. Put in place a parenting plan that respects the child’s relationship with each of his or her parents. Consider that the children of divorce fare better when there is cooperation between parents.

Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help

Stress and anxiety can take a toll, even on children. If you think you are experiencing symptoms of depression, or if you think your family can benefit from talking about their feelings with a professional, don’t be afraid to seek help. Sometimes an impartial third party can give you some perspective on your situation.

You may even find going to the doctor to be supportive as they might be able to prescribe you something to help you cope. However, if you prefer a more natural method, then you may want to check out websites such as https://perfectplantmarket.com/pages/thca-flower-austin, for example, to see how this can be beneficial to your health. As always, make sure that you check with a medical professional first to ensure that this is okay for you to do.

Family and friends are another source of help and support. If you need someone to talk to, someone that can help with the kids, or someone to have margaritas with, family and friends might be the ones to call. Taking care of yourself will go a long way to keeping your house harmonious and your mind at ease.

In the end, remember that children are young but they are still people. Treat them with tenderness and courtesy and even the most chaotic periods of their lives can be overcome.

Brian is the founder of Kids Ain’t Cheap and is now sharing his journey through parenthood.

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How Much is Too Much? Establishing Gift Guidelines with Children

December 11, 2013 | 2 Comments

Last week at work, a lady ended up bringing her daughter with her to her dental appointment. Her daughter sat quietly over in the corner reading a book while I treated her mom. At some point the young girl, less than 8, started asking me questions. Everything from why I have a mask on to what I was doing to her mom. So I could stop answering so many questions (which all led to more ”why’s”) I started asking her questions.

Given the time of year, I asked her if she was getting excited for Christmas. She immediately brightened right up and exclaimed, yes. We started chatting about the crafts she was making in school and what she was going to ask Santa for. My daughter being only 18 month old, I was curious to know what she was asking for and what she expected to get. She explained that her mom told her that Santa only has room for three presents in his sleigh so she had to think carefully about what she wanted.

Setting a Present Limit With Children

I though the three present limit was a good idea. We all know how out of control children’s lists can get, which can, in turn lead to disappointment. The little girl explained that since she’s only allowed to ask for three gifts, unless they were really big, ”like a horse” she would get them, no questions asked. I thought it to be interesting to know the same parent who set the three gift rule had her daughter to believe whatever she asks for within her three gifts, except horses would be given to her.

The little girl asked for, and expects to receive an iPad, $100 cash to shop with and a new Xbox one. What?!

Obviously I couldn’t really comment beyond, ”that’s a big list” since I wasn’t about to ask mom how she planned on doing that but to me, this list seems crazy to me. Again, I only have one child who is very young but she will not be raised to believe that Santa or mom and dad, will be providing close to $1,000 worth of gifts.

Even if you’re not a religious person, my opinion is that Christmastime is meant to be a time of year when we slow down, reflect on what we have, share gifts with ones we love, and reminisce. Simplify our lives for a few days, enjoy good food, bake cookies from scratch and focus on building memories, not things. I think it’s important that if you’ve decided to make gifts apart of your Christmas tradition, guidelines, or rules be set in place. The earlier you start the easier it will be.

Setting Realistic Gift Guidelines

Guidelines for not going overboard with gifts may include:

Setting a gift limit. Either in volume or price. If you set a three gift limit from Santa make sure they understand they are realistic with it. If you think it’s appropriate that they ask for a $400 gaming console, make sure they know the couldn’t possibly ask for both an iPad and cash as well. For older children, let them know early on that mom and dad have a Christmas budget to work with and they may not get everything they want.
Get them involved. Have your children help you shop. Have them shop with you for another family member and let them know the budget. Have them learn what that money can buy. This will help them have a better understanding of what they can ask for and what they may receive.
Open discussion. Especially with younger children, who’s understanding is still very much forming, help them with things like writing their letters to Santa. Explain that they may not be able to get everything they ask for.
Gift swap. This works especially well in larger families. Everyone draw someone’s name and you’re only responsible for gifts for that one person.
Reminders. It’s so easy to get caught up in the commercialism of Christmas. Remind your kids, and self, on a daily basis what the true meaning is (which may vary between individuals an families). Memories,not things.

I have had very sparse Christmases (in terms of gifts) and had years with more gifts that imaginable. I never feel any different about the season. I was taught early about the real meaning and to hold onto memories as much as I can. Learning to enjoy the simpler things in life will go a long way, even when Christmas is over for the year.

What are your thoughts on setting realistic gift guidelines?

Personal and Financial Christmas Safety

December 4, 2013 | Leave a Comment

Though the holidays are supposed to be a wonderful, celebration-filled time of year, there are often an increase reported incidents related to personal and financial security.

You need to protect yourself, your family and your belongings even more during the holiday season it seems. By taking a few necessary steps you can ensure you have an incident-free holiday!

Take Care of Yourself!

Now is not the time to skimp on a healthy lifestyle. You need to be in top shape for the holiday insanity rush! Not only for that perfect New Years Eve outfit you may have, but a good diet and exercise will be the stamina you need to make it through the six plus weeks of celebrations. It is to be expected that there will be some indulgences with the season, living well the rest of the day(s) will ensure you don’t see the side effects of your enjoyments! Get out there and move.

It also goes without saying, that if you’re at a holiday event and there is alcohol involved do not drink and drive. Nothing is more precious than a life. Ensure those around you practice the same safety precautions as well.

Protect Your Belongings

Crime is at an all-time high in December. More cars and homes are broken into and there is an increase in credit card theft. Be aware of this and keep yourself and your family safe from these tragedies. Make sure you home is locked (and armed if you have a security system) when no one is home. Keep your car locked especially when there are gifts present. If you’re shopping, store your purchases in the trunk. Thieves are more likely to attempt a break-in if they can see something they want. They won’t necessarily waste their time if they’re unsure. Having a safe at home for valuables is always a good idea, regardless of the time of year.

When making purchases, paying with credit card for bigger ticket items may give you insurance should the item be lost or stolen as well. Make sure you keep all receipts in case something happens to anything you buy as well. It may only be a $20 toy but if it doesn’t work or you need to return or exchange it for any reason without a receipt, it is a waste of money. The holidays are not a time of year one wants to be wasting money unnecessarily.

When shopping online, make sure the checkout it secure. All legit websites should be secure and there won’t be anything to worry about but if you’re uncomfortable with a checkout process, do your homework, especially with smaller websites. Same goes for charities, never donate to an unregistered charity. All legit charities will have documentation and issue a receipt for your donation.

For additional financial security, make sure you keep track of any and all warranties for gifts received and purchased should you ever need to make a claim.

After the gifts have been open, dispose of your garbage carefully. If a thief sees that giant 72” TV box at your curbside you better believe you’ll be a prime target. Cut all obvious boxes up and don’t ”display” obvious packaging.

The holidays are a good reminder to be overall more aware of our surroundings. If we take proper steps we can all have a safe and fun season!

What other ways do you protect yourself during the holidays?

A Pet Owner’s Guide to Surviving the Holidays

December 3, 2013 | Leave a Comment

The holidays are times of both excitement and stress, of festivity and fatigue. If you own pets, you not only get to prepare lavish meals, shop for family and friends, decorate, and wrap gifts, but you also have to deal with keeping your furry kids out of trouble when guests are over or when there are dangerous edibles like chocolate laying around.

But don’t despair! Owning pets can enhance your holiday spirit, not hinder it. Just check out the following tips for surviving the holidays with pets at home:

Staying Out of Trouble

The biggest issue with pets is that they can’t seem to stay out of trouble, especially when there are human treats and toys and decorations all around them. It’s quite a departure from the living arrangements they’re accustomed to for the other eleven months of the year, so many pets are naturally intrigued by the sweet smells in the air and tinsel hanging from the walls (they’d probably love nothing more than to claw or chew it all up!).

For starters, the ASPCA offers a comprehensive list of foods that are hazardous for dogs as well as one for cats. Things like chocolate can really upset their stomachs (or worse, if eaten in large quantities), so be sure to secure garbage containers and leave no food out where your pet could snatch it. Even if you have a cat or a big dog that’s normally pretty obedient, don’t underestimate what they’d do to get at that chocolate cake or roasted chicken sitting on your counter.

Also be mindful of decorations that could potentially harm your pet, such as a tree (make sure it’s locked in place so it can’t fall over) or small decorations that they could chew up or swallow, causing intestinal issues that could lead to a pricy visit to the veterinarian.

Hosting Guests

Having guests over for holiday parties presents another problem for pet owners: what should you do with Fluffy and Fido? Some people won’t appreciate animals freely roaming around while they’re trying to eat, but locking up your pets for several hours isn’t a realistic or humane option either. Your options here include: leaving your pets in your bedroom with a comfortable inside dog bed and letting them out after your guests have finished their meal, hiring a pet sitter to take care of your pets while you’re busy playing host or hostess, asking your neighbor to look after your pets for the evening (only if they like animals, of course), or if you have children and your party is for the adults only, ask or pay your human kids to look after your furry, four-legged kids for the night.

Going Out of Town

If you go out of town for the holidays, the logistics of making sure your pets are taken care of become a bit more complicated. Some people don’t mind dropping their pets off at a boarding facility, but not only are these rather pricy during the holiday season, they could potentially lead to health problems if your pet catches an illness from someone else’s pet. Another option is to simply bring your pet along on your holiday travels, but for many, this isn’t possible due to limited space or pet restrictions at your destination.

There is also the option of hiring a pet sitter, but this could cost you in upwards of $20-50 per visit, depending on the time duration and services rendered (e.g., taking your dog on a walk or crushing pills for your cat). If you don’t have a doggie door or your cat doesn’t use an indoor litter box, you could end up having to pay for multiple visits to make sure your pets are going to the bathroom regularly. To save money, consider hiring a reliable teenager in your neighborhood who clearly loves animals and would love to make some cash over the holidays by looking after your pets.

It is worth remembering, however, that teens are not always the most reliable people and may not be able to deal with an animal with complex needs. As such, in cases such as this, a professional sitter might, despite the initial expense, be the best option for you. You can click here to see the advantages of hiring a dedicated cat sitter, and can further search online to find local sitters tailored to your pet’s specific needs that fall within your budget. This way, you know your pet will be well cared for for as long as you are away.

If you’re only heading out of town for one night, however, you may be able to get away with leaving your pets alone, as long as they’re relatively independent anyway. All you need to do is give them a good meal before heading out (you can check out these Dr. Marty Nature’s Blend reviews if you’re looking for something to treat them with) and ensure they can go to the toilet in their normal way without you. If your pets are well-behaved, you can also put out some food for breakfast in the morning. Most pets only eat when they’re hungry, so once they’ve had their fill, they’ll leave the rest for whenever they want it.

Holiday Gift-Giving

Sure, there’s a lot to think about when it comes to managing your pets during the holidays, but it’s not all precautionary measures! When it comes time to unwrap presents, it’s always fun to give something to your pet to make sure they don’t feel left out. Whether it’s a simple bone or bag of cat treats or a luxurious new bed (you can always search around for coupons and coupon codes to minimize the costs of gifts for your pets), getting something for your pet is a nice way to share the holiday cheer with every member of your family.

What other tips and tricks do you have when it comes to pets around the holidays?

Brian is the founder of Kids Ain’t Cheap and is now sharing his journey through parenthood.

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My Best Advice For New Moms

November 26, 2013 | Leave a Comment

Three of my friends are either pregnant or recently had their first babies. 18 months in for me, and they’re looking to me for support and advice. Though I hardly feel like I’m an expert, new moms like to talk, read and connect with other moms regardless of their ”expertise”.

Being a mom is, without a doubt, the hardest thing you will ever do. It will challenge you emotionally, physically and spiritually in ways you didn’t know possible. I don’t want to sound like I am excluding fathers from this but being a mom is different. The relationship your child has with you, will be different then the relationship they have with their father. Not good or bad, just different. Mom is mom and the challenges that face us are different. We will also face challenges united, as a parenting team, but you as a mom will face challenges with your child that the father will never truly understand (reciprocal is also true).

Take Care of Your Emotions

The relationship you form with your child is quick and intense. You grew this baby inside you for nine months. For me, after she was born, there was an awkward adjustment period of getting over the fact that I was no longer pregnant and nurturing this baby inside me. Sure she was now on the outside, which is all I wanted, and I was caring for her, but it took me a week or so of getting over not being pregnant. I can see how easily some women could fall into postpartum depression, for me it was weird and sort of sad. I was not at all prepared for the emotional changes that took place in the first day or so.

I can say without a doubt that breastfeeding helped me keep these emotions in check. I know there are circumstances preventing some women from being able to breastfeed, but if you can, do it. Breastfeeding is a hard skill to master but once you get a hang of it, it is an amazing experience. Once you can relax it becomes almost meditative. Breastfeeding is what helped me bond with my baby and move past the ”I’m no longer pregnant” emotions.

Nurture Your Marriage

Give your spouse attention. Married or not they need attention. The first year or marriage is a cakewalk compared to the first year with your first child. Talk about it all you want but until you become parents you have no idea what the other person will be like as a parent. My husband continues to surprise me and I’ve known him almost 15 years.

My experience is that my husband felt sort of useless the first few months. I was breastfeeding which meant me doing all the feedings and since I was off on maternity leave for the year, I was doing almost all of the child care duties (diapers etc). He was working full-time and supported us in other ways (breaks, even just for a shower, helping with meals, laundry) but not being directly involved with the child duties, especially feeding in a breastfeeding relationship, is tough on dad.

Dad needs reassurance that you’re still his wife. He will see you flourish as a mom but he also needs to be reminded that your his wife too. Don’t let your marriage (or relationship) get put on the back burner when you become a mom. Get a babysitter, even for an hour during a nap and be with each other, without baby. It’s hard at first but you both need it. Trust me.

Roll With The Punches

Before becoming a mom, I would admire all the mothers in my life and think, how do they do it? How do they have all the answers and know so much? I’ve learned very quickly that there’s a lot of rolling with the punches, making it up as you go and most importantly, being in tune with your child.

Only you as parents will really know the exact distinction between cries and understand their non-verbal language. You see a baby crying in a store and all you hear is crying. A mom knows the difference between pain, frustration, overtired or want/need something. This innate skill is what makes parents look so informed.

Being a parent is hard but so rewarding. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

Give the Gift of Experience This Holiday Season

November 25, 2013 | Leave a Comment

When you’re a child, you can’t wait for Christmas. You count the days until Christmas, and the night before, you might have trouble falling asleep because you’re so excited. Christmas morning you likely got up bright and early ready to tear through your presents. Christmas was so much fun!

As you age, the joy can go out of the holidays. You know you’ll need to spend both time and money to find the perfect gift for someone. Others buy you gifts, but often, the items are things you really don’t want or need. If you have the means, you might return the items for something you do want, but often, the gifts just join a pile of clutter somewhere in your house. Sound familiar?

Let’s be honest. By the time we’re early middle aged, we can buy most of what we need. Getting presents isn’t nearly as exciting as it was when we were younger.

But what if we could change that?

How, you ask?

Simple. Instead of giving “stuff”, give the gift of experience.

Do you know someone who loves to snowmobile? Why not book a night or two at a cabin where he can spend the day snowmobiling with friends? If he doesn’t have a snowmobile, make the arrangements to rent him one. If you still want to give a traditional gift, why not buy a top rated snowmobile helmet to wear while enjoying his experience gift?

You can also give the gift of your own presence with your experience gift. Kids usually receive way too many toys during the holidays. Instead, give your child a gift that expands on her interests and talents. If you have a child who loves to cook, why not sign her up for a kids’ cooking class? You could take the class with her and give the gift of your presence, too. A nice accompanying gift might be her own cookbook or apron for cooking at home.

The gift of experience also works nicely for parents in their sixties. Parents this age are often retired and have more time to pursue their own interests. To pick the perfect experience gift for them, focus on their interests. You could buy them tickets to a musical or theater performance. If your parents are very adventurous, you could buy them a skydiving package. You know best what they would like.

When buying a gift of experience, you can search the web and find businesses that offer already prepared gifts of experience. Or, you could make the arrangements yourself, contacting the business and purchasing the items needed for the experience. The one advantage to buying an already prepared experience through a business is that you may be able to return it if it is an experience the person would rather not have.

If you’re looking to spice up your holiday gift giving, try giving the gift of experience. It’s a gift your recipient will likely never forget.

Brian is the founder of Kids Ain’t Cheap and is now sharing his journey through parenthood.

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Christmas Shopping the Right Way

November 24, 2013 | Leave a Comment

Christmas can be expensive. As well as trying to put money aside for Christmas parties, food, cards and wrapping paper, there are the Christmas presents to think about. Shops now try and provide us with as many offers as possible to make it easier and cheaper to give people the gifts they want.

Understand Your Credit Card

There are a few ways you can save a bit of money when shopping for Christmas presents. One of these is Section 75. It is a piece of legislation that basically states that you should buy things with your credit card and not a debit card. With a credit card, you can get your money back for things you buy if they have broken or there is something wrong with them. It also guaranteed you get your money back if they don’t turn up. For example if you’re buying tickets for something and they don’t turn up or the show gets cancelled, you are entitled to your money back. It also works alongside issues such as if the retailer becomes out of business. It is a definite stress saver!

Find The Deals

A lot of websites that provide online shopping now also give a gift wrapping service. Sometimes it is thrown in as a free extra, other times you pay a small amount for it. In the long run it can save you a fortune in wrapping paper, bows, bags and boxes. It also means if you aren’t that great of a wrapper – you can count on it being professionally done! Bargain.

Supermarkets make the most of deals and provide us with many offers, so make sure you shop around. The supermarkets are all competing against each other, so finding the best deals for you is important. Often they do BOGOF (Buy one get one free) or Three for Two deals which are handy when making Christmas dinners as you need a lot of food. Look for things that can be frozen or saved so that you aren’t wasting the food. Wine and spirits often go on offer at Christmas which will save you money. Aldi sell a lot of unbranded alcohol that tasted just as good – it’s the best place to stock up if you are expecting a lot of guests.

How else do you shop for Christmas to find the deals?

Brian is the founder of Kids Ain’t Cheap and is now sharing his journey through parenthood.

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Are You Considering a Divorce?

November 24, 2013 | Leave a Comment

The holidays can be a wonderful time to spend with family and friends. Though the holidays can be filled with a flurry of activity, most people enjoy the season because they like watching the joy on their children’s faces and the magic of the season.

But unfortunately, the holidays can also be a time of sadness if you are unhappily married. While you may be able to ignore the trouble in your marriage during the year, the stress and togetherness of the holidays can bring into focus just how unhappy you are. There’s nothing like attending party after party putting on a happy face when you don’t feel that way at all.

Don’t Jump to the End

If you’ve realized that you’re marriage is failing and you’re deeply dissatisfied with it, don’t automatically assume that you’ll need to get a divorce. Instead, you can try to talk to your partner and see if they might be willing to see a marriage therapist with you. If they won’t, you could certainly see a therapist yourself to learn how to deal with the situation. Often, just changing your own behaviors can inadvertently result in your spouse changing their behavior. Similarly, don’t assume that problems in bed mean that the marriage is ending. There are plenty of health conditions that can cause problems, and your partner may not even understand their problem themself. Erectile dysfunction, for example, is unlikely to mean your partner no longer finds you attractive. Instead, it’s more likely to be caused by hormone imbalances, so it might be a good idea to contact an ED Clinic Pasdena, or similar clinic in your own area, to determine the best course of treatment.

Consult a Professional

Another step you may want to take is to meet with an experienced divorce lawyer in Daytona Beach, if you live near there or to seek the counsel of one near you. Consulting with a divorce lawyer doesn’t mean you will get a divorce. It just means you’re looking at your options.

An initial meeting with a lawyer like those at Peters & May – your family law solution in Mayfair can help you understand what the process will be like and they will be able to give you legal advice surrounding your situation. The lawyer could tell you what steps you should take now, what is required in your state to pursue a divorce as well as how custody arrangements would likely work.

The lawyer will also likely remind you of all the implications of a divorce. Alimony will need to be determined as well as the splitting of assets.

As well as using the services provided by the lawyer, you may want to investigate your partners behaviour further with the help of a private investigator. For example, if you think your partner may have been unfaithful to you and you need proof before going through with a divorce, then you could hire a Bond Rees private investigator (or amending this to your local area) as they will be able to dig deeper and reveal any secrets that your partner has been hiding from you.

Try To Make Things Work

For many, though, financially, it’s better to stay married. If you don’t think your marriage is completely over, seeing a therapist and working through your issues is often the best course of action. Depending on the state you’re in, you may face the loss of half of your retirement fund as well as alimony payments, if applicable. If you’ve been a stay at home mom, you’ll likely need to re-enter the workforce, which can be a challenge after you’ve been out of it for several years.

However, there are times when a divorce is best for you and your family. Only you know if you’ve reached that point. If you have, a good divorce attorney can be very important both to help you with custody of your children and with the fair separation of assets.

If you know friends who’ve been divorced, ask them for their recommendations. Family friends who are in the legal field may also be able to direct you to an attorney you can trust to get the best divorce settlement for you.

What other tips do you have?

Brian is the founder of Kids Ain’t Cheap and is now sharing his journey through parenthood.

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Why a Career in Mortgage Lending Could Be Right For You

November 22, 2013 | Leave a Comment

“Being a mortgage loan officer can be very rewarding,” begins Sharon McCormick, a senior loan officer at Prime Lending in Dallas, Texas. “Firstly, you are working with people who are making a very big and usually positive step in their lives. You are the person who helps to deliver their dream — the American Dream — of homeownership. That’s incredibly rewarding. Second, this job is less of a job and more of a business, unless you’re working in the standard bank environment. You can set your own hours and there is no limit to how far you can go or how much you can make. There is no waiting for a promotion or raise — if you are working hard and doing a good job, your income will continuously increase.”

If you’re looking for banking jobs or finance jobs and that hasn’t sold you already, read on. We spoke to a couple professionals who work in mortgage lending to find out what the field has to offer, and why it might be right for you.

Working With People

“The thing I like most about the mortgage business is that you really get to know people in the first 15 minutes you meet them,” says Patrick Palzkill, owner of Boston-area Beacon Rock Real Estate and Mortgage. “Many times you get to know more about that person after the first interview than 95% of their friends and even their family!

“You hear about the successes in their life (the children/grandchildren), about the new job promotion and the exciting new home they are getting,” he says. However, it’s not all happy news all of the time, and that comes with the territory. “You also see the other side of the coin, when you look [through] the divorce decrees, bankruptcy papers, and verify the negative items on the credit report.”

Perhaps it’s this very close knowledge of your clients’ lives that can make the reward of seeing some get their first home so powerful. “It’s always great to go to the closing for a first time buyer and watch them pick up the keys. Every deal is different and that keeps things exciting,” shares Palzkill.

Good Salaries

There can be financial rewards as well for this and similar banking jobs. CBSalary.com lists the average annual salary for a loan officer in the U.S. to be a respectable $73,366. A mortgage lender is listed as earning, on average, $68,078. Of course, these figures can vary quite a bit depending on what part of the country you live in and, more importantly, how well you perform.

On the subject of performance, we ask what kind of person tends to do the best in mortgage work. McCormick gives a few insights.

“The recipe for success is very consistent,” she replies. “What matters is that you have the right personality and attitude. First, to become a success as a mortgage loan officer you must be self-motivated and driven, because no one is going to chase after you except for your competition. You have to be detail oriented, so that you can manage the very specific regulatory requirements and work through very tiny yet very important details. Strong communication skills are absolutely essential. Patience, flexibility and agility are must-haves, since this industry is incredibly dynamic. The way things are done one day will be changed the next, and you have to be willing and able to roll with the punches.”

Lot’s of Paths to Success

To that end, she goes on to say that mortgage lending is a field in which very few consistent background factors can predict success. Good news for those seeking banking jobs and are worried they didn’t study the right thing in college or start off on the right foot when they were in their twenties.

“Conversely,” McCormick explains, “there is no specific demographic that is more successful in this line of work — your age, background, gender and even level of formal education really don’t matter. Wes Ley, the adjunct professor teaching residential finance at DePaul University in Chicago describes the diversity of his class as ‘Amazing. It’s like the United Nations in a classroom. We have people of virtually every race, with no actual majority. We have people of every age.’”

What are your thoughts about working in the mortgage lending industry?

Brian is the founder of Kids Ain’t Cheap and is now sharing his journey through parenthood.

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Taking Advantage of Cash Rebates

November 21, 2013 | Leave a Comment

Cash rewards for purchases are underrated when they should be recognized as smart money savers. Take advantage of pairing coupons with cash rebates as well, for an even larger reward on your purchases. Easier said than done if you aren’t too experienced in aggressively pursuing these savings methods. Luckily, with a little practice and procedure, your shopping cart will be full and so will your wallet.

Exploring Yourself

The first step to becoming an expert saver is to explore yourself. Ask yourself what you deeply desire, whether it be a new pair of shoes or a tasty family size pack of sweets. Figure out what you want, write it down and put the ideas in a safe spot. Organizational skills play a major role in saving. You have to keep track of everything, and it can be overwhelming. Time management can be a bother, as the process of filling out cash rebate forms and clipping coupons can be draining. All you have to do is prepare a time slot to for this significant formula. We typically know how long we are out shopping; add an additional hour to cover your tracks. Thirty minutes for coupon resourcing before shopping, and 30 minutes for cash rebate papers afterwards. Time and money well spent!

Taking Initiative

After you know what you like, and have planned time slots to actually ensure that you get what you desire you have to explore rebate sites. You can also find rebate forms:

Printed on packaging
On tags beside merchandise
Tear-off rebate forms on products

Companies encourage rebates and they place advertisements in newspapers and magazines, newsletters, radio, television, internet websites and more. You only have to be aware to take notice of the opportunities around.

Cash Rebate Websites

As for online cash rebate websites that also include coupons, these are golden tickets to saving. Not only will you receive cash back, but you will also save immediately on that purchase without having to wait for your refund.

The Good & The Bad

The good news is that there are many advantages that accompany cash rebates for both you and the manufacturer. Three major advantages include:

Reasonable refund on high priced products
according to the IRS they are tax-free price reductions
Boosts customer sales and visibility

As for the bad, there isn’t much bad with rebates, however, if you plan on purchasing an item for the cash rebate and you do not follow through then you will have only purchased a company’s special item without them doing much promotion in turn increasing their sales.

Taking advantage of cash rebates is a learning process and it takes practice, but with every great thing comes great responsibility, along with that take accountability and initiative and start saving today.

Are you planning on taking advantage of cash rebates sites this holiday season?