Kids Ain't Cheap

Our Favorite Stocking Stuffers for Teens

November 24, 2022 | Leave a Comment

After you buy Christmas presents for your kids, you have one item left to tackle—the stockings. Unfortunately, I find stocking stuffers can be challenging to buy, and if you’re not careful, they can be more expensive than the gifts under the tree. Still, stockings are a nice bonus and one of my kids’ favorite parts of Christmas. Over the years, we’ve acquired several favorite stocking stuffers for teens.

A Hint for Affordable Stocking Stuffers

Every parent’s budget differs, but we’ve found that we prefer smaller stockings to stuff. For a few years, we had giant stockings, and filling them was expensive! So, we got rid of those stockings and picked smaller ones (luckily, while the kids were still little, so they didn’t notice). Now, we can fill the stockings more affordably, and they also overflow with gifts (since they’re smaller), which the kids get excited about.

Favorite Stocking Stuffers for Teens

We try to include both necessary and fun items in their stockings.

Fun Stocking Stuffers

Over the years, the kids have enjoyed these stocking stuffers:

Compact Games

We like to play games in our family, so their stockings often include a smaller game we can play as a family. Card games like Uno, Sushi Go, and Five Crowns have been hits. We’ve also included dice games like Tenzi and Yahtzee to Go.

Lip Balm

My kids like flavored lip balms such as fruit flavored or Christmas flavors like candy cane, vanilla, or mint chocolate. Their favorite brand is Burt’s Bees.

Sweet Treats

Even though my teens now have money to buy their treats, they love getting candy in their stockings, especially milk chocolate bars. They also enjoy receiving hot chocolate packets so that they can enjoy hot chocolate on Christmas morning.

Gift Cards

The older teens get, the more they enjoy gift cards to buy their own items. My kids’ favorite gift cards are from Amazon, Starbucks, and local fast-food joints.

Art Supplies

My artist in the family enjoys receiving art supplies such as paints, paint brushes, watercolor pencils, colored pencils, and other art items.

More Practical Stocking Stuffers

In addition to the fun gifts, we also like to fill the stocking with some practical, necessary items.

Socks

Every year I give my kids some socks in their stockings. These bulk up the stockings, and everyone needs socks throughout the year.

Batteries

If the kids are getting any presents that require batteries, I put the batteries they need in their stockings. Then they can use the battery-operated gifts they received on Christmas day without making a separate trip to the store.

Final Thoughts

Christmas stockings in our family are not an afterthought. Instead, they’re a gift as important as the wrapped presents under the tree. These are our favorite stocking stuffers for teens, and our kids love receiving some variation of them each year.

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RV Living with Kids

November 10, 2022 | Leave a Comment

When my grandparents retired, they sold their house and began RV living full-time. They would travel year-round, but for about six weeks every summer, they would park their RV in our yard, which I loved. They loved the low cost and the freedom to go anywhere. However, though my grandma never complained, I know that she was sometimes frustrated by the lack of space. I think of the two of them whenever I read about the recent trend of RV living. Of course, this trend is not for everyone, but for certain families, RV living full-time with kids can offer incredible freedom.

How to Make RV Living Full-Time with Kids Successful

If you’re thinking of making the leap to RV living, you need to first lay the groundwork.

What to Do Before You Begin RV Living Full-Time

Before selling your house and buying an RV, ensure you’ll enjoy the lifestyle.

Rent or Borrow an RV

First, rent or borrow an RV and take the kids on an extended trip. You’ll see what it’s like to live in tight quarters as a family. The average American house is 2,200 square feet, but a 26-foot RV has only 230 square feet. So, you and your family need to get used to living in only 10 percent of the space you’re accustomed to. That can be a hard adjustment for many.

Don’t Sell Your House for the First Year

You may be tempted to sell your house to make money to buy the RV and travel, but if possible, try to hold onto your home for the first year you’re living in the RV. Even if you try out RV living for a few weeks, that’s not the same as living in an RV full-time. You may get a few months into RV living and decide it’s not for you. If that’s the case, you can always move back into your home with few repercussions. If you sell your home before moving to RV living full-time, you’ll have to start over if that lifestyle isn’t for you.

Suggestions for Smooth RV Living with Kids

If you try out RV living and decide you like it, there are steps you can take to adjust more quickly to the lifestyle.

Downsize

If you’re going to leave a 2,200 square foot house to move to a 230 square foot RV, you’ll need to downsize. . .a lot! Plan to get rid of 80 to 90 percent of your stuff.

Watch videos on minimalism and capsule wardrobes because that’s what you and the kids will need. If you don’t think you’ll live the RV lifestyle forever, put your things in storage. Otherwise, sell what you can and give the rest away.

Agree on Privacy Rules

There isn’t much room for privacy in an RV, so for your sake and the kids’, agree on rules from the beginning. For instance, if the bathroom door is closed, someone is in there, so don’t go in. (Leave it open the rest of the time.) Consider putting curtains around beds that aren’t in their own rooms. When someone is on their bed with the curtain closed, respect their privacy and leave them alone. This will be more important as your kids head into the tween and teen years.

Choose Child-Friendly Camping Sites

Some campgrounds aren’t child friendly. When choosing campsites, find ones with playgrounds so the kids can play. It would be even better to find campsites near lakes and hiking trails so you can take the kids for a swim or a hike. Kids need time to get out their energy, especially if most of their time is spent in the RV.

Consider Homeschooling

When you begin your new lifestyle, you will need to look at school choices for kids. If your kids are in traditional brick-and-mortar school, you’ll need to make new arrangements. You have two options.

Homeschool

You could homeschool, which offers maximum convenience because you can homeschool while traveling. Even better, you can make your travels part of your homeschool by visiting historic attractions and studying the geography of the areas you travel to.

Online School

Another option is to have your children enroll in an online school. This is an excellent option if you plan to put your children back in traditional school eventually. (If you homeschool your kids and try to put them in conventional school later, you may run into resistance from the school district.)

The only drawback to online schooling while traveling is that you may struggle to get a reliable internet connection.

Have Regular Times to Come Back Home

When you hit the road to begin your new lifestyle, you will likely leave behind extended family and friends. To help your children handle possible homesickness, schedule time to return home regularly so your children can see their friends and maintain friendships.

In between regular visits, utilize Zoom to connect with hometown friends and family when you’re on the road.

Remember the Lessons You’re Teaching Your Kids

RV living full-time can be stressful. However, remember that you’re teaching your kids amazing lessons by living this lifestyle. Because you have to downsize to live in an RV, your kids learn to become minimalists. Furthermore, you fill their lives with experiences, not stuff. How many kids can travel around the country as your kids do?

Your kids will see and do things that most Americans don’t get to. You can be in Florida one week and in Missouri the next. The choice is yours. In addition, between all the travel, you teach your children to be flexible and go with the flow.

Final Thoughts

RV living full-time with kids isn’t for the faint of heart. However, the rewards are rich. You give your children a chance to see the United States in ways few others get to. You are also more likely to grow closer as a family.

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How to Travel with a Kid Who Isn’t a Great Traveler

October 20, 2022 | Leave a Comment

My husband and I love to travel. Neither of us traveled much during childhood, so we want to share the world with our kids. However, we’ve had to figure out how to travel with a kid who isn’t a great traveler because one of our children dislikes traveling. This child has always struggled with travel, and while we respect that, we don’t want to stop traveling because we feel it’s an integral part of the life experience we want to cultivate for our kids.

How to Travel with a Kid Who Isn’t a Great Traveler

Our child, who I will identify in this post as “Blair,” has struggled with traveling since the toddler years, so this isn’t a new phenomenon. However, we’ve learned these tricks to make travel better.

For Younger Kids

Take Breaks

When we traveled when Blair was younger, we scheduled plenty of breaks. While driving, we’d stop every hour or two, ideally at a rest area or restaurant with a playground.

When we were at our destination, we planned one event per day. The rest of the day was downtime. For instance, we went to Boston when Blair was a preschooler. There was so much I wanted to see and do, but we just did one activity per day. We went to the Boston Tea Party Ships and Museum and then returned to the hotel so Blair could watch some favorite kids’ shows and relax. Even though we didn’t get to go to as many destinations as I would have liked, Blair still remembers throwing the crates of tea off the ship.

Bring Travel Diversions

We usually travel by car, so I started packing travel diversions when the kids were little. Before the trip, I would buy small activities and trinkets like a water coloring book or a fidget spinner. Then, I would wrap the item, and the kids could open it once we reached a predetermined destination. So, the package would have a label, “Effingham, Illinois,” and the kids could open the package when we drove through Effingham. This gave them something to look forward to, and then the activity occupied them for some of the ride.

See Child-Friendly Sites

When you’re traveling with the preschool set, you won’t be able to see all of the destinations you’d prefer as an adult. Instead, know that you’ll have to include many child-friendly sites and activities. For our Boston trip, Blair remembers throwing the boxes of tea off the ship and the costumed interpreters throughout the city.

Remember, your kids are only little once. As they get older, you can visit attractions designed for tweens, teens, and adults.

Bring Lots of Snacks

Two things make kids this age cranky—lack of sleep and lack of food. We always bring abundant snacks to combat the latter. We have car snacks, which is especially important if you’re traveling in a deserted area without many food options. When we’re at our destinations and seeing sites, I always put snacks and bottled water in my backpack because a child will get hungry, even if we’re only out for two or three hours. My kids are all teens now, and we still carry ample snacks when traveling

For Older Kids

Once our kids got older, they needed fewer breaks on the road trip, so we were able to travel faster. However, I continued to bring travel diversions for them. We also used these techniques.

Create a Travel Map

Using Google Maps, I printed out our entire route for each trip. I put the maps in a transparent cover and give the kids dry-erase markers. They can mark our route as we go and see exactly where we are and when they get to open their road trip surprise (yes, I pack surprises for the kids to open at specific destinations even into their teens!).

Give Them a Say in the Trip

I would be happy visiting museums, historic houses, and living history museums everywhere we go. Some of my kids, not so much. Instead, now that they’re older, we let them each determine at least one activity we’ll do during the trip.

For instance, we recently went to Philadelphia, and one of our kids wanted to go mini-golfing. Since we could have gone mini-golfing anywhere, that wouldn’t have been my choice in a vacation destination. But we did it, and this child had a great time. Mini-golfing was one of the highlights of the trip for her. My other daughter picked visiting The Franklin Institute, which, again, I would not have chosen, but we had a good time, and that destination was another highlight of our trip.

Give Them a Digital Camera

If you have the means, give each child a digital camera. They can take pictures of the sites you’re seeing and make albums of the trip. They can also have fun taking silly pictures of themselves or one another.

Spring for Extra Space

If you travel with a kid who isn’t a good traveler, is that child an introvert? My guess is yes. Blair is an introvert and, like most introverts, needs time to unwind and recharge alone. Unfortunately, that can be tough to do when sharing a hotel room.

If you can, consider paying for extra space. For instance, instead of booking a hotel room, book a vacation rental by owner. If each child can get their own room, the reluctant traveler can have time to recharge and unwind alone. For Blair, part of the travel struggle is spending all day, every day of the vacation with family with no personal space. Larger accommodations can solve this problem.

Final Thoughts

You may consider abandoning travel with a kid who isn’t a great traveler, but remember all of the benefits that come from traveling—seeing new locations, how other people live, and learning living history. Rather than abandon traveling until your child grows up, try some of these techniques to make your next trip smoother.

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7 Unexpected Expenses as Your Kids Get Older

October 6, 2022 | Leave a Comment

My friend recently had a baby, and she has so much fun dressing him in cute clothing that she buys from Etsy. He has a better wardrobe than most adults! I understand her excitement in decking her baby out in adorable clothing (I did the same thing when I had my first child). However, I know her budget is tight, so I want to tell her, “Save some of that money for unexpected expenses as your kids get older,” but, of course, I don’t say that. Yet, parenthood has taught me that life will always throw you and your kids curve balls, which are often expensive!

Here are some unexpected expenses to plan for as your kids get older:

Larger Vehicle

You may think your current vehicle will suffice, especially if you only have one or two children. However, you may be surprised how quickly your family outgrows the car. We had a Toyota Echo when our first child was born, which I thought would be fine. However, we traveled frequently, and all the gear we had to bring for the baby didn’t fit in an Echo. So, in less than four months, we moved up to a minivan, which we still have 18 years later!

Don’t forget that your kids will likely want to bring friends to different activities, which is another reason you might need a bigger car.

Increased Grocery Bill

Everyone knows the grocery bill will increase when you have kids, but no one is prepared for the tween and teen years. Kids that age are growing rapidly, and they need a lot of food! When my son turned 11, I was shocked at how much he started to eat!

Private School or Homeschool

Public school is a good option for most kids, but some need a different environment, so their parents send them to private school. Or, parents like us might decide that homeschooling is a better option. Unfortunately, you may have planned for your kids to graduate from public school, so you’re unprepared to pay for private school or homeschooling when public school doesn’t work out.

Therapy for a Disability

No parent thinks their child will have a disability. I didn’t, yet, I have three kids, and each one has two diagnoses—two with autism, two with dyslexia, two with ADHD. These disabilities have cost us thousands of dollars in therapy that insurance would not cover. Thankfully, the therapy helped and the kids are doing great, but we did not anticipate having to pay for therapy, let alone having to spend so much.

Psychologist

Likewise, many kids, especially during COVID, needed a psychologist’s assistance. While most insurance plans cover psychologist appointments, you will likely have to pay a co-pay. Even if your co-pay is only $20 a session, you’re paying $1,080 over a year if your child goes once a week.

Electronics

Thirty years ago, parents didn’t have to pay a lot for electronics unless it was for a Nintendo or Atari game. Now, kids need laptops for their schoolwork, especially since some of the work (or all of it) may be online. In addition, most teens and tweens have cell phones that you’ll need to pay for.

I bought my youngest two simple Gabb phones, but they still run $50 monthly for two lines. Electronics expenses add up quickly!

High School Fund

A wise parent will start a high school fund when their children are young. Many activities in high school are pricey. Consider saving for

Class trips,
Homecoming,
Prom,
Senior pictures,
College application fees,
ACT or SAT prep and test fees

Final Thoughts

If you have a baby or a toddler, pour yourself into them, but remember, there are many unexpected expenses as your kids get older that you’ll want to save for now. Even though it’s cute to dress babies in adorable clothes, make sure you’re also saving for the future.

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Simple Ways to Create Memories with Your Kids

September 22, 2022 | Leave a Comment

Sometimes when your kids are little, every day might seem so LONG. The kids have endless needs you have to meet, and they might fuss, cry, or have tantrums. However, smiling older women look at you in the store and compliment your beautiful family and reminisce about their now-grown children. People tell you, “The days are long, but the years are short.” Yet, while you try to enjoy the days, sometimes you struggle. As your kids grow older (and it happens so quickly!), you realize that the time you have with them is fleeting, and you want to create memories with them. Here are some suggestions to do just that.

Simple Ways to Create Memories with Your Kids

Creating memories with your kids doesn’t have to be expensive. You simply need to spend your undivided time with them.

Actively Watch Their Sports

How often have you gone to kids’ sporting events and seen parents not watching the game but instead giving all of their attention to their smartphones? Put the phone aside and watch your kids. They notice, and they’ll appreciate that you spend time on them, not on the internet.

Have a Dedicated Movie Night

One fun family tradition is to have a dedicated movie time. In our family, we watch a movie on Sunday afternoon. This activity may not seem like much, but your kids will likely enjoy this tradition and remember it fondly when looking back on their childhoods.

Play Board Games

Likewise, you can have a family game night. Or, if you can’t play board games with the family that often, make a habit of playing a board game with your child at least once every two weeks. Your kids will enjoy playing the game and the time you gave them.

Read Aloud to Them

This family tradition is best started when your kids are young, though you can begin any time they’re in elementary school. When my kids were babies, I started reading aloud to them, and we never stopped. My younger kids are now 13 and 12, and I still read aloud to them every day. I’m sure this is one activity they’ll cherish and hopefully repeat with their children.

Have a Yes Day

Too often, we parents say no because it’s more convenient than saying yes. Challenge yourself to say yes one day and see how different the day will be. “Mom, can we go to the park?” Yes. “Can I bake a cake?” Yes. If the activity the children propose isn’t dangerous or out of your budget, try saying yes and see what happens.

Take Them on Vacation

Finally, if you have the means, take your children on vacation. Getting out of your element and exploring new places leads to family bonding, especially when you reminisce about your adventures years later.

Final Thoughts

Kids grow up too quickly. The older women in the stores are right—the days are long, but the years are short. Cherish the time you have by utilizing simple ways to create memories with your kids. You’ll be glad you did.

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Vacation Before Your Kids No Longer Want to Hang with You

September 8, 2022 | Leave a Comment

When I was a teenager, my mom and I traveled together, just the two of us, for one week every year. We both enjoyed these trips. However, teenagers don’t always enjoy traveling with their parents, even when their parents take them on a once-in-a-lifetime trip somewhere like Europe. Often, kids as young as 11 or 12 would rather be with their friends than their parents. Therefore, you may want to have an epic vacation before your kids no longer want to hang with you.

Many Families Struggle Financially in the Early Years

Unfortunately, many families struggle financially in the years when kids are young. Parents have to pay for diapers, formula, and daycare, none of which are cheap. In addition, parents may be younger and starting their careers, so their pay is low.

Once the kids are older, say ten and up, parents are on firmer financial footing and have more money to spend on vacations. Unfortunately, this may coincide with the time kids don’t want to do as much as their parents.

Prioritize Fun in the Younger Years

In his book, Die with Zero, Bill Perkins suggests that you spend most of your money upfront when you’re young enough to do the activities you want to do physically. This allows you to create a rich memory bank to sustain you in your older years when you’re not physically able to do as much.

Likewise, your children have a sweet spot between eight and 13 where they enjoy vacations and traveling with you before they get too involved in their own lives and friendships. That is when you want to prioritize travel with your children, even if it means scrimping in other areas of your life to find the money for travel.

My Experience Traveling with Kids

When our kids were young, we lived in the Midwest. We didn’t have money for travel, but my husband frequently had to attend work-related conferences. For the conferences a day’s drive away, the kids and I could tag along because my husband’s work paid for the hotel room. We’d pack food and try to visit as many free attractions as possible. The kids loved it. We went to Philadelphia, Ohio, North Carolina, Minneapolis, Quebec, and our favorite, Boston.

When the kids were 10, 5, and 4, we moved to Arizona. We couldn’t travel with my husband anymore because conferences were no longer within driving distance.

Now, we recently moved to New York. My husband has a conference in Philadelphia, so we were excited to resume our tradition with the younger two kids, now 13 and 12, and take them with us. To our surprise, the 13-year-old is indifferent to the trip and the 12-year-old is complaining about having to go. So now, our travel window seems to have closed. Of course, we’ll still travel with them, but we miss the excitement they used to have about traveling.

Final Thoughts

If you have younger kids, I recommend you prioritize taking a vacation before your kids no longer want to hang with you. Hopefully, they will always enjoy traveling with you, but if not, your memory bank and theirs will be filled with earlier, fun vacations.

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Our Favorite Quick Lunches for Kids

August 25, 2022 | Leave a Comment

Back-to-school season brings the dreaded lunch prep. If your child doesn’t get a meal at school or you need to pack food for daycare, you know what I mean. Parents should pack a lunch that the kids like, has variety, and is relatively healthy. After a few weeks, getting into a lunch-packing rut is easy. My kids used to go to school, and I remember how time-consuming packing lunches could be. Now we homeschool, but last year, instead of making lunch every day, I started packing our favorite quick lunches for kids so they could pull them from the refrigerator at lunchtime, and it was a time saver!

Time-Saving Techniques

Utilize these strategies to save time preparing lunches:

Get the Kids Involved

Let the kids help you by making sandwiches or filling containers with chips. Kids are more likely to want to eat what they help make because they can make the food the way they want (within reason). For example, my girls split this job. One makes all the sandwiches for the week, and the other fills all the chip containers.

Take Advantage of Dead Time

When cooking dinner, I often have dead time when I need to stir the meal I’m cooking, but I don’t have anything else to do while waiting for the food. I use this time to cut carrot sticks and celery or other fruits and vegetables to add to lunches for the week.

Prepare in Bulk

Another good strategy is if you’re making a few, make many. For instance, if I need four hard-boiled eggs for a meal, I’ll make 12 so that I have extra that I can use for future lunches. Likewise, if I make energy balls with peanut butter and oats, I’ll make a double batch and stick some in the freezer for lunches next week.

Easy Foods to Prep

Some foods are quick to prep and freeze well.

Frozen Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches

Instead of making one PB & J sandwich, make sandwiches out of an entire loaf of bread. Then, freeze each sandwich. Remove it from the freezer in the morning, and the sandwich will be thawed by lunch.

Muffins

Make a batch or two of banana muffins or another flavor your kids like and pop them in the freezer. Then, you can pull them out individually to put in lunches each day.

Easy Fruits

Some fruits like cantaloupe and watermelon require you to cut them open and chop them into bite-size pieces. These aren’t the kind of fruits I pack. Instead, I choose easy fruits such as clementines or grapes. All I have to do is stick a clementine in the lunchbox or give the grapes a quick rinse and put them in the container.

Final Thoughts

Making lunches can be time-consuming, but the process doesn’t have to be. Our favorite quick lunches for kids are easy, nutritious, and taste good. Plus, you’ll have more time in your day when you’re not spending as much time prepping food and packing lunches!

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5 Ways We Inspire a Love of Reading in Our Kids

August 14, 2022 | Leave a Comment

As a child, one of my favorite activities was reading. This love of reading and later, writing, helped lead me to major in English in college, become a college English instructor, and learn more about the world than I ever could have without books. Because books enriched my life so heavily, when I had kids, I wanted them to love reading as much as I did. Luckily, most of them do. We inspire a love of reading in our kids using the following methods.

How We Inspire a Love of Reading in Our Kids

To help your kids fall in love with books and reading, you need to immerse them in the reading world.

Read Aloud to Them

From the time our kids were born, we read aloud to them. At first, we started with short board books like Goodnight Moon and The Going to Bed Book. (At this stage, don’t be surprised or annoyed if your child asks you to read the same book over, and over, and over again!) Then we expanded into longer stories until we were reading our kids chapter books when they were in preschool. I continued reading to them all through middle school.

Have a Home Library

To foster a love of reading, surround your kids with books. We always had bookshelves filled with books the kids could look through when they were little and read when they started school.

You don’t have to spend a lot of money to do this. For example, we picked up most of our kids’ books at garage sales for 10 cents or less.

Take Them to Library Activities

The public library is a wonderful resource that we utilize frequently. We started by bringing our kids to the library to pick out their books and to join in on story hour. Because of these early experiences, our kids always associated the library with fun.

Participate in Reading Rewards Programs

In the summer, sign your kids up for reading rewards programs. For example, Pizza Hut has the Book It program. Your public library likely has a reading program, too. Our son was one of the top readers one summer in elementary school, so he got to join the other top readers for a bowling and pizza excursion compliments of the library. He still talks about how much fun that was.

Let Them See You Read

Kids learn best by watching your actions. You can tell them that reading is fun, but if they don’t ever see you reading, you’re not reinforcing that lesson. My kids see me read books and hear me listen to audiobooks in the car. I love to read, and they see me regularly taking time to do so.

Final Thoughts

We inspire a love of reading in our kids, which was one of the best things we could do. Today, they still read for fun and recreation, enjoy learning, and have an exceptional vocabulary.

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Why Our Child Decided to Take a Gap Year

July 28, 2022 | Leave a Comment

Our 18-year-old son graduated from high school this year. As most seniors do, he applied to several colleges in our area last fall. He got into all of them and received substantial scholarships to two of the colleges. He planned to start college this upcoming fall. And then his life was upended, which is why our child decided to take a gap year.

What Is a Gap Year?

For those who don’t know, a gap year is when graduating high school students take a year off before they begin college. They use that time in various ways, such as working to raise money for college, volunteering in the field they want to pursue, or traveling.

Why Our Child Decided to Take a Gap Year

In May, my husband got a new job 2,200 miles from our current location. Our son had always wanted to go to college nearby to live with us and save money. However, because we were moving in July, he no longer wanted to go to the colleges where he had received scholarships. He had to start his college search over again.

Unfortunately, the college scholarships that were plentiful in October had all but dried up by July.

He found colleges to apply to in our new location that accepted applicants on a rolling basis. He did get a few scholarships, but not nearly as many as he would have gotten had he applied to those schools in the fall.

To make matters worse, he would have had to pay out-of-state tuition because we hadn’t lived in the new state for 12 months before he wanted to start college. So, after careful consideration, he decided to take a gap year.

How He Plans to Use His Gap Year

Even though he never considered taking a gap year, he’s warmed up to the idea. He’s made a long list of activities he plans to do for his gap year.

Volunteering

Our son has always been interested in volunteering. During high school, he volunteered more than 100 hours. He hopes to volunteer at a local cat shelter and the public library during his gap year.

Working

In addition, he plans to work part-time and save money for college.

Applying to College

In the fall, he will reapply to the colleges he applied to in July. Since he’s applying at the typical time students do, he’s hoping he’ll be eligible for more significant scholarships.

Final Thoughts

My husband and I understand why a gap year is the better choice given that we’ve recently moved to our new location and colleges in the area would be pricey. We are slightly concerned that he may decide not to go to college after this. However, our son was always the youngest in his class because he has a summer birthday, so taking a gap year may be the perfect way to give him more time to mature and qualify for larger scholarships.

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3 Mistakes We Made in the College Process

July 14, 2022 | Leave a Comment

First children are always the guinea pigs of the family. Parents experiment with them and learn how parenthood works. They understand that once you have children, life doesn’t always go as planned. Our oldest, who recently turned 18, is also our guinea pig when it comes to college. We’ve learned that there are significant mistakes we made in the college process with him. Luckily, we’re learning from these experiences, so hopefully, we’ll be smarter with the college process with our younger two children.

Not Having a Backup Plan

My husband and I have always worked in education. I worked at a community college until I quit after our third child was born, and my husband has worked at two different universities.

We didn’t have money to save for college when our kids were young, but we weren’t concerned because we knew that our children could receive a tuition discount if they went to college where my husband worked. Between that discount and the scholarship our son received, he could have lived at home and gone to college for free.

However, life doesn’t always work out as we plan.

Moving After His Senior Year

My husband had been looking for a job for the past 18 months. He had interviewed and made it to the final rounds for four different jobs. However, none worked out. He applied for one more this past February, and we decided if he didn’t get that one, we’d quit looking until after our oldest finished college.

Luckily, for my husband’s career, he got the job. However, the job required a move across the country. While the job pays much more than his current position, it’s not at a university, so we no longer have a college tuition discount.

In addition, our son hadn’t applied to any of the nearby colleges in the new location because we didn’t know we’d be here. He missed out on the prime time for college admissions and scholarships. Now, he’s stuck applying only 6 to 8 weeks before college begins.

Not Specifying How Much We Would Contribute

Some parents tell their children what amount they have to contribute to their college education. Then, the children can use that amount as a basis to help them determine which colleges they will attend based on affordability. We never had that discussion because we didn’t think we had to; our child knew he could get a substantial tuition discount.

Now, we don’t know how much we can afford to pay because we’re moving to a new geographic area of the country and still aren’t sure how much typical monthly expenses will be. That makes determining affordability difficult.

Final Thoughts

The three mistakes we made during the college process have made the experience more difficult for our son than it needed to be. We had a unique set of circumstances that, hopefully, won’t happen to our younger children.

However, we’ve learned from our mistakes and will now be saving for their college tuition and setting a limit for them that we can pay.

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