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Kids Ain't Cheap

But They Sure Are Worth It

How to Afford Being a Stay-at-Home Mom

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how to afford being a stay-at-home momWhen I was pregnant with my first child, every day held excitement about the future. But I couldn’t quite shake the weight I felt on my shoulders when I thought about returning to work six weeks after her birth. I wanted so desperately to stay home, but simply couldn’t imagine how to afford being a stay-at-home mom.

It just doesn’t come up much in school, does it? “Living On Half Your Income 101.” Yeah, not so much. Today’s culture often says things like “Put it on credit” or “You deserve more” or good ‘ole “YOLO.” But some dreams involve spending and earning a whole lot less.

And they sure are worth it.

See, my husband and I really needed a roadmap, some kind of guidelines to help us navigate these tumultuous waters.

If that’s you, then let me encourage you. Our “get-your-financial-act-together” journey started in 2011. In 2012, my husband and I paid off $22,000 to become debt-free right before our daughter’s birth. We stockpiled as much as we could into our emergency savings and learned to continually live within our means (MUCH harder than it sounds!).

This led to one of the happiest days of my life. It was in May of 2014. I was 30 weeks pregnant with our second child and kept having labor symptoms when I’d work on my feet all day at my job. Rather than risk a premature delivery, that became the catalyst for our leap of faith.

That was the day I quit my job and officially became a stay-at-home mom. I waddled to my car with astonishment stamped on my face. It really was happening.

You need to understand the primary reason for this astonishment. We would now be living on less than $2,000 a month. It seems impossible that we could have done this (especially if you knew how bad we were at budgeting when we were single!). The thing is, we hustled our hineys off and no longer had debt. We’d been budgeting like paupers and renting from family instead of rushing into a home we couldn’t afford.

Even on such a small income, we really were ready. Hence my amazement.

Every dream is different. And that’s OK.

Your dream may not be to stay home. That’s totally fine! If you love working outside the home, then embrace that and enjoy your work. Nor are you required to generate an income if you do decide to stay home full-time. Let’s just get that out there.

So many of the steps we took as a couple had very little to do with me making extra money from home. They set an important foundation that centered around three major components:

  • Communication
  • Changing habits
  • Financial freedom

Let’s pull back the curtain a little further and explore what I mean.

How to Afford Being a Stay-at-Home Mom

Here are some practical first steps you can take in your journey toward spending more time with your kids!

Step #1: Kick debt to the curb.

When my husband and I committed to paying off our outstanding debt in two years instead of seven, we forced ourselves to:

  • Budget every month
  • Snip our credit cards and always pay with debit or cash
  • Live intentionally on less
  • Communicate in healthier ways about money

For example, the biggest way my husband and I melted debt was to intentionally begin living on his income. It took months, but eventually, we were able to apply every dime from my paycheck toward debt.

After that, our small income became that much more powerful. Imagine what you could do with your money if you didn’t have any payments. That one thought spurred us on.

Recommended Article: “10 Steps to Create a Successful Stay-at-Home Mom Budget”

Step #2: Save for the unexpected.

Saving for emergencies is the most powerful way you can create financial stability in your home. Smaller emergencies like an oil leak can be covered in the “auto repair” portion of your budget. But what if your income-generating spouse loses his job? That buffer is the difference between you remaining a stay-at-home mom through that transition or scrambling for work alongside your partner.

A great place to start with a savings buffer is $1,000. More can be accumulated once you’re out of debt, but that first $1k is your Kevlar vest against calamity.

Step #3: Act.

We covered the basics. Whether you’re a mother or would like to be one someday, you can begin this journey today. It’s time to choose your next step and ACT.

A great place to start is a conversation with your significant other. This plan requires openness and commitment from both of you. It’s also going to take time. Best to start the conversation now.

For example, when I messed up the budget, I knew I could approach my husband about it instead of burying my head in the sand like I’d done in the past. We worked through many problems that way. Extend grace. Talk about your dreams. Re-commit.

Another great next step is to further your education. Try joining a Facebook group that centers around whipping your family finances into shape. The added support is tremendous. Here are two great groups you can join:

Build on the foundation.

If you’ve read this far, it means you’re dead serious about your dream of becoming a stay-at-home mom. That’s awesome.

I believe you can do it, but this is just the framework. It’s not going to keep the rain or wind out of your house. To add siding, insulation, a roof, and even some shiplap if that’s your fancy, then I strongly encourage you to check out my eBook called “The Stay-at-Home Mom Blueprint.” In it, I expand my story on climbing out of debt and achieving my dream of staying home. I also walk you through 150 practical strategies that my husband and I used (and still use today) to communicate better, chop debt, and save money.SAHM Blueprint

This is the roadmap I wish I’d had when we first dreamed of transitioning into a single-income family.

Also, if you do want to earn money from home, “The Stay-at-Home Mom Blueprint” includes dozens of ideas to sell your stuff, earn gift cards or cash from home, or build an online business. My business didn’t happen until nearly two years after I became a SAHM. Since then, I’ve made nearly $20,000 just working part-time as a freelance writer. I know without a doubt that this business wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t safely transitioned into a stay-at-home mom first.

Ready to take your journey toward staying home to the next level?

Grab your copy of “The Stay-at-Home Mom Blueprint” today.

Your Turn: What advice would you give someone on how to afford being a stay-at-home mom? Share with us below!

This post may contain affiliate links.

Image Credit: AI Photography

Hungry for more financial tips for stay-at-home moms? Look no further!

Here are 8 of the Best Kids Books On Audible

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best kids books on audibleWe all know reading to a child is paramount to his or her development. In my experience as a mother of two, I’m always on the hunt for fun, new ways to teach my kids. One of our favorite ways is listening to audiobooks. Therefore, I put together my top 10 list of the best kids books on Audible.

There are several benefits from audiobooks that I would like to share with you.

Kids learn to sit still. A byproduct of your children sitting in one place and paying attention to the narration of a book is that they’ll develop a stronger habit of sitting still. Even my two-year-old has shown improvement in his ability to sit quietly when the need arises. This comes in handy when you’re in a public place such as a waiting room or classroom.

Also, audiobooks expand a child’s vocabulary. Children are often introduced to new words in context and with their pronunciation. Often these books promote education, behavior, language, mathematics, etc. It also gives your child a fresh form of media besides a screen.

While reading to your child at bedtime is a vital bonding experience, audio books for kids create another dimension of imagination and education without the addictive side effects of screen time.

Let’s take a look at some great audio books my kids enjoyed over the last few years.

8 Memorable Audio Books for Kids of All Ages

EARLY LEARNERS – 0 to 5 years

1. “The Little Engine That Could” by Watty Piper

Despite its small size, the little engine used the power of positive thinking to conquer a mountain. This lesson is great for every generation of kids and can be enjoyed on audio with the rich tones of Mike Ferreri narrating.

2. “The Peter Rabbit Collection” by Beatrix Potter

This beloved classic exposes your children to the adventures of Peter Rabbit and his woodland friends. On Audible.com, you can now enjoy the entire Peter Rabbit collection for a very low price.

3. “The Cat and the Hat and Other Dr. Seuss Favorites” by Dr. Seuss

What was your favorite Dr. Seuss book as a child? Well, now it might be available on Audible for your whole family to listen. These best-sellers have stood the test of time for six decades.

Not to mention, this collection of audible stories is narrated by:

  • Kelsey Grammar
  • John Cleese
  • Dustin Hoffman
  • Billy Crystal
  • And More…

GRADE-SCHOOLERS – 6 to 11 years

4. “The Wizard of Oz” by Frank L. Baum

This classic story is so enjoyable to listen to, due to the dynamic narration performed by award-winning actress, Anne Hathaway. She brings an “all-in” devotion to each character that will capture your kids’ attention (and yours, too!).

5. “Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone” by J.K. Rowling

Why am I putting one of the most popular children’s books on this list? Two words: Jim Dale. Never have you heard an audiobook until you’ve been read to by award-winning voice talent, Jim Dale. Even as an adult, I get a kick out of J.K. Rowling’s great storytelling and Dale’s diverse collection of voices for the memorable characters in Harry’s world.

If you believe your child is old enough for the thematic elements of this book, then give the audiobook a shot.

6. “The Kid Who Only Hit Homers” by Matt Christopher

Do you have a ball player in your family? I don’t know of anyone who wrote better sports books for middle readers than Matt Christopher. I’d finish a story, and feel a strong impulse to grab a ball and glove and speed off to the park.

One of Christopher’s most popular stories, “The Kid Who Only Hit Homers,” is available on audio with a full cast of narrators.

7. “The Hobbit” by J.R.R. Tolkien

This dramatized audiobook is the narrated telling of Tolkien’s bedtime story about the adventures of Bilbo Baggins. Follow his journey with a whole slew of dwarves as they head toward the Misty Mountain in search of their long-lost treasure – guarded, of course, by a fire-breathing dragon.

8. “Hidden Figures” by Margot Lee Shetterly

This is the true story of the African-American women who helped the United States win the space race. Shetterly’s book became a movie in 2016 and sends an important message to young people that their minds are precious, no matter their color or gender.

Reading is a delight that can last a lifetime. Help your child understand the many layers of literature and the skills he or she will need to get lost in a story and enjoy the endless worlds waiting on the pages.

Bonus Reading: “Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library Wants to Give Your Child a Free Book Every Month”

Got your own list of best kids books on Audible? We’d love to hear it!

If you’re a stay-at-home mom, make sure you bookmark or pin some of these great resources for later!

Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library Wants To Give Your Child a Free Book Every Month

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Dolly Parton's Imagination LibraryDid you enjoy watching Reading Rainbow as a kid? Turns out, the popular educational show was much more than children’s entertainment; it was a movement. For 20+ years, the show did its best to inspire children of all ages and walks of life to pick up a book and read. Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library picked up the same torch to inspire young readers all across the world.

How important is it for children to read?

We’ve all heard the saying that “leaders are readers,” but the importance of literacy goes much deeper than that. According to a study by the US Department of Education, 32 million adults in America can’t read. Another study shows that two out of every three students who don’t proficiently by 4th grade could end up on government assistance or in jail.

Statistics like that drove people like Levar Burton and Dolly Parton to make a change. With Reading Rainbow, kids learned from books read and discussed on TV. In Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library, new books show up right on your doorstep.

What is Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library?

In 1995, Dolly Parton cast a vision to grow children’s love for reading in her home state of Tennessee. Regardless of their family’s income, Parton sees to it that every child receives a quality, age-appropriate book to read every month.

Over 20 years later, more than 80 million books reached young readers in the United States, Canada, and the United Kingdom.

Author’s Note: I recently went through the sign-up process and discovered that my region is not currently eligible. Upon further research, I discovered that organizations partner with Parton’s foundation to fund the expense for books in their specific regions. Therefore, be aware that not all locations qualify.

What Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library Could Mean for Your Family

In an age when children are parked in front of screens for up to 11 hours a day, a resource like this may tip the scale on that balance. Imagine a new book showing up in the mail for you to read each month.

Recommended Reading: 7 Screen-Free Activities for Preschoolers

If this is an initiative you’d like to support or you’d like to sign your child up today, check out Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library for instructions on how to donate.

Other Ways to Save Money On Children’s Books and Promote Reading In Your Home

If your region isn’t eligible, don’t give up. Here are some more money-saving options for your young reader:

  • Weekly storytime at your local library
  • Reading contests at school or the library
  • PaperBackSwap.com – Trade your books with other members for a small trading fee.
  • Book swap parties – Invite some other parents to your home and ask them to bring any children’s (or other genres of) books they’d be interested in swapping. Lay them all out on a table, draw numbers, and take turns picking from the “new inventory.” Get your kids involved, too!
  • Consignment sales – Books are often sold for $1 or less.
  • Garage sales
  • Audiobooks – You can check these out for free at the library. They include a book for children to use as they listen along.

For more on reading for your kids, or reading to your kids, check out these great articles.

The Importance of Reading to Your Child
A Fun and Economical Way to Get Kids Interested in Reading: Comic Books
Here are 8 of the Best Kids Books On Audible
5 Best Comic Book Storage Boxes and Bins
6 Best Comic Book Display Shelves

What were some of your favorite books to read as a child? Tell us in the comments below!

 

Free-Range Parenting: Is it Too Scary to Consider?

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Free Range Kids by Lenore SkenazyHow would you feel about letting your child go to a neighborhood park to play on their own? Do you allow your children the freedom you had growing up? I think we would all like to do that – but realistically speaking – isn’t it too dangerous? Some people say — no. As I was doing research for my last post, I stumbled upon a few articles that included thoughts and opinions, on Free-Range parenting. I had heard about it, but didn’t know the specifics.

What I did know, was that columnist Lenore Skenazy, made the decision to let her 9 year old son navigate the New York City subway all on his own. This of course was after she made sure that he knew about the subway system and could read a map. Skenazy then wrote about it in the New York Sun. Some people – I’m going to guess there were quite a few – thought she was crazy and that she was taking a huge gamble with her child’s life. At first, I thought so too and it had a lot to do with something that happened last summer.

When a child wanders off

While the actual event only lasted a few minutes, it felt like an eternity. It terrified me and left me shaken for the rest of the day. I took the boys – who had just turned 3 – to a nice park on the other side of town. It’s one of our favorites, has wide open spaces, and a really fun playground.

When we got there I heard music. There was a man playing a guitar and singing. He was located in the covered picnic area, which is right next to the playground. Right away my “mom radar” went off. I told myself that I shouldn’t be so judgmental and I just needed to relax a little. I sort of did —  but I was careful to kept an eye on the guy and an even closer eye on the boys.

The boys were playing and having a great time. There weren’t too many people there, so they had free run of the place. A. had climbed a little too high for his comfort and asked me to come help him get down — so I did. When I turned around to look for N. he was no where to be seen. No where!

I tried not to panic. I kept one hand on A. and began calling for N. I looked all over.  I looked on slides, on the swings, in tunnels and nothing. Then I saw something that made my heart sink and almost brought me to tears. The man – the one playing the guitar – was gone too. Suddenly, every episode I had ever watched of America’s Most Wanted and Dateline NBC – relating to abducted children –  flooded my mind. I imagined that man had grabbed my son, and slipped away unnoticed.  I tried to stop thinking about it, but I couldn’t. Now —  I was frantically calling. A. began asking where N. was and started to call for him too.

All of a sudden, from around a corner, came my sweet- faced darling boy. I’m getting teary just reliving this again; that’s how much it frightened me. I grabbed N. and hugged him and thanked God that he was okay.

Free-range parenters believe risks over over-stated

So after that experience – and the panic and fear that I felt – how could I even think of (eventually) giving them the kind of freedom Skenazy advocates? Well, she and others like her, think that shows – like the ones I just mentioned – are what keep us over parenting our children. Skenazy also notes in her book Free-Range Kids: How to Rise Safe, Self-Reliant Children (without going nuts) that the occurrence of children who are abducted, is actually quite rare. Rare or not, I think I would be a nervous wreck if I allowed the boys – at age 9 – to ride their bikes to the library all on their own. Would they be fine? Probably, but what if they weren’t? I would never ever forgive myself if something happened to them.

I have been reading Skenazy’s blog and I really like it. I didn’t think I would. I thought I’d be outraged by everything she posted, and I’m just not. She is right that hovering and trying to remove all of the potential dangers and disappointments in life — isn’t doing anything for our kids. So what if they fall down and get scraped knees or a broken bone? It’s going to happen but they will heal and they might learn to be more careful next time.

Look — I spent my summers climbing trees and riding my bike around the neighborhood (often times doing dare-devil maneuvers like standing on the seat). Sure I fell, but I have some really fun childhood memories – and impressive scars – because I got to do that. I don’t think I would ever be able to allow the boys to navigate the subway system at age 9 but I’ll be reading Skenazy’s book. I’ll probably still feel the same about a lot of things, but it will definitely give me some food for thought. I certainly don’t want to take anything away from my kids, but their safety is my first concern! I think the book is worth a read! I’ll keep you posted 🙂

So what are your thoughts? Are you for or against Free-Range parenting?

Is Audible Worth It? Here’s How to Make The Most of Your Membership

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is audible worth itI have been seeing and hearing ads for Audible.com for well over a year now but always ignored them.  I love to read and audiobooks never interested me so consequently the ads never interested me.  Over this past year, a lot has changed.  I subscribe to a lot of podcasts.  Some are entertaining and some are educational.  I listen to a few podcasts every day at the office and love the portability of taking them with me on my iPhone and listening to them in the car or when I exercise.  For some reason, I never saw being entertained or educated via a podcast as the same thing as listening to an audiobook. My overall change in attitude got me wondering, “Is Audible worth it?”

Why I Considered Audible

Additionally, my favorite news radio station has suddenly become very hard to tune into consistently.  It must be my car as it works fine in my wife’s car but I no longer have that as an option.  Sure, there are music stations that I like and I always have all of the stuff on my iPhone to listen to but I was still disappointed to lose that radio station.

Finally, I have a 30 to 35-minute commute to work every day and it just started feeling like more and more wasted time.  With two kids and a busy work schedule, I don’t have nearly as much time to read as I once did.

One day this past November, I was listening to one of my favorite podcasts and an ad came on for Audible.  It just somehow clicked this time.  They were offering 50% off their Gold membership plan for the first 3 months.  I will give you a rundown of the membership plans a little later in this article.  With that initial trial, I downloaded Stephen Kings The Gunslinger, it’s the first book in the Dark Tower series.  It’s a series I have always been meaning to read but never seemed to get around to it.   The audiobook normally sells for $19.93 but with this membership offer, I got it for $7.62.  It’s less than a hardcover book but a little more than the paperback would have cost me.  That seemed pretty reasonable to me knowing that they had to pay a voice actor to read the book.

This was my first exposure to an audiobook and it did not disappoint.  The process of signing up with Audible was simple as was the process of purchasing the audiobook and putting it onto my iPhone.  Audible offers a download manager that takes care of all of that.  The voice actor did an excellent job, his voice matched the tone of the story and it wasn’t rushed.  I looked forward to my commute to and from work so I could listen to the next part of the story.  It took me about 2 weeks to get through it which is a lot faster than it takes me to get through a regular book nowadays (mostly due to time).  I had joined with the intention of getting a book, trying it out but most likely canceling before the 3-month trial expired but I have changed my mind, I am an Audible and audiobook convert!

Is Audible Worth It?

After getting that first book, I decided that it would be a good way to accomplish several goals:

  • Get caught up on books I have wanted to read just for the fun of it
  • Get caught up on the business and personal finance books that will help me improve my financial situation and grow as a businessman
  • Find some books in the Audible for Kids section for my boys and see if works as a way to keep the kids occupied on long car trips

With what seemed like the makings of an actual plan forming, I got a new book in December called Freakanomics.  It’s a book that asks strange questions and really makes think you about the economics of life.  I decided that I would alternate.  My membership plan with Audible gives me one free credit every month that I can use towards the purchase of any book.  Since I can’t afford to spend more than I am already spending on the membership, I will get myself one book a month and alternate between pure entertainment and books that will also educate.  I enjoyed Freakonomics but didn’t learn as much from it as I had hoped.  It was more a collection of essays that got you thinking that it was a lesson in economics.  Still, a worthwhile read/listen but probably not one I would recommend as a must read.

January came around and I got the second book in Stephen King’s Dark Tower series but I also sprang for a second book (it was only $6.49).  The Audible for Kids books are pretty inexpensive if you are a member and I really wanted to see if my kids would enjoy listening to something in the car.  My son is in Dinosaur mode.  It’s all he talks about, thinks about and plays with these days so when I saw the Magic Tree House, Book 1: Dinosaurs Before Dark I had to get it.  It’s meant for longer car trips like the one we are taking in a week to see some family but I tested it out on the drive to daycare and to my surprise, there wasn’t a peep out of either of my boys on the whole ride.  They sat there with mouths open listening to the story.  When we got to daycare, they said they liked it but weren’t ecstatic about it nor have they asked to listen to it again so I got a bit of a mixed review from them.  I think the real test will come from that hour-long cart trip we are taking next week.

Audible Membership Plans

Before deciding whether or not Audible is worth it for you, you should know there are several membership options. Before you sign up, it’s important to know what you are going to get with each one.

No Membership

This isn’t really a membership plan but it should be mentioned as an option.  You do not have to become a regular recurring member to buy from Audible.  If you only think you are going to want a few audiobooks a year, this is the way to go.  You will have to pay full price for that audiobook but it’s better than committing to a monthly membership plan.  To participate, simply go to Audible.com and buy a book.

Audible Listener Gold

This is the plan I am on.  This plan costs $14.95 a month but with that, you get 1 free credit every month and with that credit, you can get any book you want.  They key here is books on Audible range from $4.95 up to $35 so if you are going to subscribe to a plan like this make sure you are using that credit to buy a book that costs more than the plan.  It doesn’t make sense to spend $14.95 for the month and then use that free credit to get a book that would have cost you $4.95.  Most books are more than $14.95 so you will have plenty to chose from.  As a gold member, you also get 30% off anything that is not purchased with a credit, free audio programs and a complimentary subscription to the audio version of the New York Times or Wall Street Journal.  You can get the same deal I did and click the following link to get 50% off your first 3 months at Audible

Audible Listener Gold Annual

This is the same as the plan above but you pre-pay for the entire year.  When you do this, your cost per credit goes from $14.95 per credit to $12.46 per credit.  Worthwhile savings if you know you are going to stick with it for a year.  If you aren’t sure, it’s better to play it safe and go month to month.  You can still get the same discount on the first three months, just go to 50% off at Audible.

Audible Listener Platinum

This is similar to the Gold plan that I am on except it costs $22.95 a month and you get 2 free credits every month.  This brings the cost of those credits down from the $14.95 I pay to $11.48.  A better bargain if you think you will get through 2 every month.  I am not sure I can so I am sticking with the gold plan for now.  They don’t have any special offers that I am aware of with the Platinum level so sign up by going to Audible.

Audible Listener Platinum Annual – This is the same as the plan above except you pre-pay for an entire year.  This will bring your cost per credit down from the $14.95 per credit I pay to $9.56.  Pretty cheap if you know you are going to go through 24 audiobooks in a year and can afford to lay it out all at once.  Sign up by clicking here to go to Audible

Summing it Up

Audible isn’t for everyone.  If you aren’t big on books or don’t have a lot of quiet time to spend listening to these books, it’s probably not worth it but for me, they make my commute into work a lot more enjoyable.

Do you use Audible? What do you think of audiobooks in general?

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Review of Owly Volume 1 by Andy Runton

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Owly Volume 1As I have mentioned in previous posts, I have loved and enjoyed comic books for most of my life. Most people that have never been truly exposed to the medium lump them all into one category, childish superhero fantasy.  While I am a big fan of superhero comics and find most modern superhero comics to be anything but childish, the point of this review is to show you that the medium of comics can and does tell a wide variety of stories.

Comics, in the simplest terms, are stories told with both writing and art.  They cover a huge variety of genres and are aimed at an equally wide number of audiences and age groups.   Owly is an independent comic book that is both written and drawn by Andy Runton.  There is very little text in Owly.  Mr. Runton uses expressive imagery to tell very emotional and heart warming stories.

Who is Owly?

Owly vol 1 is the first comic book I bought for my children.  Harrison was 3 and Sean was 1.  Both were too young for it but they have grown into it since.  Owly is not in the typical comic book format, it is shaped more like a standard book and much thicker than a comic.  The first volume includes two stories: The Way Home and The Bittersweet Summer.  Owly is an adorable owl who knows what it means to be human.  He is a reflection of the sweet and innocent child in all of us.  In the first story, Owly is lonely and in search of a friend.  He is misunderstood by the other animals around him but he perseveres and in the end he learns the meaning of friendship.  In the second story, Owly needs to learn how to let go but he also learns that goodbyes aren’t always forever.  Both stories teach a valuable life lesson to children.

As I mentioned previously, there is very little writing in Owly, it’s done almost entirely in black and white pictures but that is the beauty of it.  The art is so expressive that it’s easy to take your child through the story and talk about what is going on in the panels.  The book also allows your little one to express himself through the images, to create his own dialogue and explain to you what is going on.  It let’s them use their imagination to tell a story that matches up with the images in front of them.  My wife had a hard time with this book at first.  The first part of the first story is heart wrenching, poor little Owly just wants to be friends but is rejected at every turn in the beginning.  The art is so expressive it nearly brought her to tears the first time.

If you can’t already tell, I highly recommend Owly.  I reviewed vol 1 simply because it’s a good starting point but there are 5 volumes that I know of.  Owly is published by Top Shelf comics and may be available via your local comic book store.  If you can’t find it locally, Amazon has it at a great price.  Check it out for yourself at Owly Vol 1.