My daughters are 13.5 and 15 years old. Last summer, I decided I wanted them to begin to learn how to manage money in preparation for leaving the nest someday. I created a new chore chart for them, increased the amount I paid them, and told them they were responsible for buying all their clothes. (The increase in chores and pay was enough to cover the cost of their clothing—if they did their chores each week.) Now that this experiment has played out over a year, I’ve discovered they’ve both become financially responsible in different ways.
Daughter #1
My oldest daughter diligently does her chores. She saves her money and tries to buy clothes when they’re on sale. Sometimes she does extra chores because she wants more clothes or spending money. This child works hard and then carefully spends her money—but she does spend.
Daughter #2
My younger daughter hates doing chores. She will go weeks doing very little and, subsequently, earn very little. Then, for one or two weeks, she will have a spurt of energy and do all her chores plus some extra.
However, not doing chores hasn’t impacted her fashion because she’s a shrewd bargain shopper. For instance, their homecoming is a few weeks away. She went to the store, shopped the clearance racks, and found a homecoming dress she loved in her size that was marked down to $14. When we checked out, we discovered the dress was a further 50 percent off, so she got her homecoming dress for $7. She continually finds bargains like this, so she doesn’t pay much for her clothes.
My Parental Frustration
My objective for this experiment was that my daughters would learn that work equals money to save and spend. If you don’t work, you miss out because you don’t have money.
My oldest daughter has learned this lesson. She works hard and carefully spends her money.
My second daughter has circumvented the system. She only works when she feels like it or needs to replenish her dwindling funds. Instead, she’s learned to be an impressive bargain shopper. She’s also learned to limit her wants so she doesn’t spend much. Her freedom from work is more important than buying things.
At first, I thought I had failed my younger daughter, but now I realize she has learned important lessons—she makes her money stretch, so she’s not beholden to a job. I’m guessing many of us adults wish we had the same ability to only work when we need to or want to.
I’m not sure how this philosophy will work in adulthood, but clearly, she’s learning money management, just in a different way than I envisioned.
Final Thoughts
If you have teens, I encourage you to try this experiment. If your kid is constantly hitting you up for spending money, make her work for that money and give her enough money, but not too much, so she learns to allocate her money properly. You may discover, as I have, that teens learn financial responsibilities in different ways, but they ARE learning responsibility.
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Melissa is a writer and virtual assistant. She earned her Master’s from Southern Illinois University, and her Bachelor’s in English from the University of Michigan. When she’s not working, you can find her homeschooling her kids, reading a good book, or cooking. She resides in Arizona where she dislikes the summer heat but loves the natural beauty of the area.
