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Kids Ain't Cheap

But They Sure Are Worth It

How to Use the Money When You No Longer Pay for Daycare

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Picture of daycare toys on a shelf

When you have a newborn baby, the expenses come fast and furious. Diapers are expensive, as is formula (if you need to buy it). However, those expenses are small compared to daycare costs. Depending on where you live, daycare can cost $1,000 or more monthly. Many parents count down until their child enters school, and they can reclaim the money spent on daycare. But not so fast. What if you reallocate the money when you no longer pay for daycare for future expenses your child will incur? (Trust me, costs keep climbing as your child moves into the tween and teen years.)

Why Should You Reallocate the Money?

Since you’re already spending a set amount for daycare, you’re used to paying that cost. So why not keep putting aside the money when you no longer have to pay for daycare? Future you will be thankful you did this.

How to Allocate the Money

Tweens and teens are lovely, but they’re also expensive! Here are some of the upcoming expenses that you may want to save for by using the money you used for daycare:

Braces

Picture of a girl smiling with braces on her teeth.

I have three kids, and two of the three needed braces. Thankfully, we had good dental insurance that covered approximately half of each child’s cost. However, even with the insurance, we still had to pay $6000 out of pocket, roughly $3000 for each kid. We started a braces fund when our first child was nine, but even then, we had to finance and pay monthly. Imagine if we had invested the money we paid for daycare. We could have covered the cost of braces from this fund since daycare for our oldest cost $800 a month (and that was over a decade ago).

Future Activities

Kids’ activities can be expensive, especially if they join traveling sports teams. My daughter takes one dance class a week, but some girls in her class are part of the company and take five to eight dance classes per week. The cost of the classes, dance shoes, and performance costumes adds up quickly. If you have more than one child with this type of dedication, the cost of classes can come close to the cost of daycare expenses.

College Fund

Finally, and perhaps most importantly, consider setting aside the money you no longer pay for daycare for a college fund. Putting money into a college fund as soon as your child is born is the wisest decision because of the power of compounding interest. However, when your child is five and attending school, if you funnel all of the daycare money into a college account, you’ll be in a strong position to pay college expenses.

Final Thoughts

Considering how you will reclaim the money for daycare once your child is in school is attractive. However, for your financial future, the more intelligent decision might be to use the money to save for other expenses your child will have, especially college expenses.

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Why You Shouldn’t Pay for Braces in Full to Save

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Why You Shouldn't Pay in Full for Braces

From about the time my oldest was six, I knew that he would need braces.  His teeth were cramped and crooked.  We were on a tight budget, and I was concerned about the cost.  When our oldest was 11, our dentist suggested he get a consult with the orthodontist.  The orthodontist told us what we already knew—he would need braces, and it was going to be expensive.  When the orthodontist gave us the various payment options, I saw that there was a discount if you paid for the treatment upfront.  After much investigation, we learned there are several reasons why you shouldn’t pay for braces in full to save.

How Much Do You Save by Paying in Full?

In our case, we would have saved $150 off the total $5,000 cost of braces by paying in full.

Why You Shouldn’t Pay for Braces in Full to Save

We decided not to pay in full for several reasons.

Impacts Your Finances

Because we were on a tight budget, paying $5,000 out of pocket at once would hinder our finances.  We couldn’t justify upsetting our finances and struggling for a few months financially to save $150.

Payment Plan Is Available

Many orthodontists have payment plans available.  These payment plans often are offered at zero percent interest.  We paid our orthodontist a $500 down payment and then paid $125 monthly for 36 months.  The monthly payment was small enough that it didn’t affect our budget.

We also had a flexible spending account, and each month, we submitted the $125 payment for reimbursement.

Had we paid for the braces in full, we wouldn’t have been able to get all of the money reimbursed from our flexible spending account because those have a yearly limit (currently $2,850).

The Orthodontist May Close His Practice

When we researched whether we should pay for his braces in full, someone warned me that the orthodontist might close his practice while our son was getting treatment.  If that happened, all the money we paid upfront would be gone.

I listened to the advice but didn’t think this was a serious concern.  How many orthodontists suddenly close their practice?  My son completed his orthodontic treatment successfully.

Then our oldest daughter got her braces with the same orthodontist.  One year into the pandemic, he pulled me aside to tell me that his business had taken a hit and he was closing down his practice.  Thankfully, we hadn’t paid upfront with our daughter, either.  I can’t imagine being out all that money, but now I know that unforeseen circumstances can arise, and orthodontists can and do close their practices.

Final Thoughts

If you’re a bargain shopper, you may like the idea of saving some money by paying in full for braces.  However, we learned you shouldn’t pay in full for braces to save because you can’t fully utilize your flexible spending account.  More importantly, your orthodontist may go out of business as ours did during the pandemic.  Then you would have lost all of the money you paid upfront, which is no savings at all.

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Financial Benefits of Optimally Spacing Childbirth

Financial Benefits of Optimally Spacing Childbirth

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Financial Benefits of Optimally Spacing Children

The average American family has children spaced 2.5 years apart. But is that ideal? What are the financial benefits of optimally spacing childbirth?

Financial Benefits of Optimally Spacing Childbirth

People argue about what is the optimal time between children. Here are some of their arguments for having kids close together and having them four or more years apart.

The Financial Benefits of Having Kids Close Together

Proponents on this side have some good arguments as to why having your children spaced close together is good.

Initial Costs for the Second Child Are Minimal

Because your kids are so close together, you have everything you need for the second child. You don’t need to buy more baby clothes or baby gear because you already have everything you need from the first child.

Parental Careers Are Less Interrupted

If one parent chooses to stay home to care for the children, she doesn’t have to stay home as long if the children are spaced closely together. If your children are only 18 months apart and you want to stay home until they’re both in preschool at age 3, you are only out of the workforce for 4.5 years. However, if you have kids four years apart, in the same scenario, you’re out of the workforce for seven years.

You Get Discounts with Multiple Children

Proponents of having kids close together acknowledge that you may face large expenses at once, such as daycare and college. However, these parents note that you’ll get a discount. When you have two children at the same daycare, you likely get a percentage off the second child. If you have two kids in college at the same time, you’ll receive more financial aid to offset the added expense.

The Financial Benefits of Spacing Kids Four Years Apart

Others argue to reap the financial benefits of optimally spaced childbirth, children should be four years apart. These are some of the benefits you reap with larger spacing.

Only Pay One Large Expense at Once

Financial Benefits of Optimally Spaced Childbirth

The best benefit of having kids four years apart is that you pay big expenses one at a time. Some of the largest childhood expenses are daycare, braces, and college. Because your kids are four years apart, by the time your first child finishes daycare, your second begins. The same is true with braces and college. While these expenses remain constant for eight years since you’re paying them back-to-back, you never face the expense of having two in braces at once or two in college at once.

While those who have kids only two years apart argue that there are discounts for daycare and college when you have two children enrolled, you’re still paying more than if you only had one child enrolled. If you space your children four or more years apart, you avoid a few intense years of high expenses that those with kids close together experience.

My Experience

I have three kids. The first two are 4.4 years apart, and the second and third are just 17 months apart. If I look from a strictly financial standpoint, the first two are optimally spaced. The oldest was able to attend preschool while I worked full-time and my husband went to graduate school full-time. However, after we had the last two 17 months apart, we could no longer afford for me to work. The cost of two kids under two in daycare in one of the largest cities in the United States cost almost as much as my salary. I would have been working to pay for my younger two kids to be in daycare.

Likewise, my oldest was out of braces when my middle child started them, so we only had to pay for one child at a time. (Thankfully, my youngest doesn’t need braces!)

Other Factors to Consider When Spacing Children

However, our choices in life are rarely entirely about finances. When determining how to space your children, you also need to consider other factors besides money.

Non-Financial Benefits of Having Kids Two or Fewer Years Apart

Despite the added expense, there are good reasons to have kids two or fewer years apart.

Children Tend to Be Closer

While this isn’t always true, children who are closer in age tend to have a closer relationship. If you want your siblings to rely on one another and be friends, you have a better chance of that happening if your children are closer in age.

They Have Similar Interests

If your children are close in age, they are developmentally at the same stage. If you want to take them to see a movie, your pick is easy because they’re at the same developmental age. This isn’t true if their sibling is four or five years older. In that case, picking an activity that is age-appropriate for the younger child often means the older child is bored because he’s no longer at that developmental stage.

Non-Financial Benefits of Having Kids Four or More Years Apart

Financial Benefits of Optimally Spaced Childbirth

In my experience, having children closer together is better from a non-financial standpoint. My younger two have a close relationship.  However, my oldest and middle child, who are 4.4 years apart, only recently started developing a closer relationship as the middle one reached her teen years and started to share interests with her brother. My youngest still does not have a close relationship with the oldest.

However, there are some non-financial benefits to spacing kids further apart.

You Have More Time to Recover

When kids are spaced four or more years apart, you have more time to recover from pregnancy and the sleepless newborn days. Honestly, when I had two kids 17 months apart, the first two years are a blur because I was so exhausted. That didn’t happen when my second joined the family.

Easier to Give Each Child Attention

With this age gap, giving each child individual attention is easier. You can read and play with the older child while the younger one naps. You can play with the younger child while the older one plays independently.

Final Thoughts

If you space your kids four years apart, there are financial benefits of optimally spacing childbirth. However, your decision when to add to your family is rarely only a financial one. You should consider all factors to make the best decision for your family.

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Would You Make Your Kids Pay You Back For Their Braces?

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make kids pay for their bracesOrthodontic treatment (aka ‘’braces’’) are expensive. The materials aren’t cheap and it’s a long process- usually 12-24 months’ worth of adjustments, fittings, elastics, retainers, it’s a lot of work. I see it every day from pre-treatment to end of treatment. It’s a big topic in dentistry for both kids and adults. Though there is a large population of adults who wear braces, most clients I see are children (or young teens) who are going through treatment, basically because their parents signed them up for it.

The dentist I work for will not place braces on a patient until they (the patient and parents) have full understanding (regardless of age) of the importance of retaining after the treatment is done. 9.5 times out of 10 a person MUST wear their retainers, at least weekly for the rest of their lives, if they want to keep teeth perfectly straight. Yes there are some miracle cases that stay even though the retainer has never been in the mouth, but there’s a slim to none chance teeth will stay straight without some retention. Teeth want to go back to their original position no matter how ‘’right’’ the corrected position is.

Given that most of the ortho people we see are young kids, who despite us reminding them constantly, rarely wear their retainers properly and end up with relapse. Sometimes it’s mild and doesn’t bother them but we see a few cases of almost 100% relapse too where the braces are removed and they simply never bother retaining the teeth.

I had one of these cases in last week. He was a 22 year old male who went through full ortho treatment six years ago. Admittedly he never bothered with the retainers and his teeth have almost totally relapsed. He was complaining because his mom made him pay her back.

His mom paid cash for his braces. Their insurance didn’t cover it so for two years his mom and step dad made monthly payments on his account for his $5,000+case.  He explained that she was mad at him for allowing his teeth to relapse and because he didn’t hold up his end of the bargain by wearing his retainers and she wanted a refund now that he was working full-time.

It got me thinking, though I work in the industry so I feel like our situation may be a little different, the fact remains that if (and likely, when) our daughter gets braces, she will be 100% informed the entire process. Unless medically necessary (there are some instances and there almost a 0% chance she will fall into one) I will not put braces on her until she agrees to follow all directions, including wearing retainers. Though I will gently remind her to wear them occasionally (how could I not being a mom and dental hygienist?) I will not hound her. It’s her responsibility and if I don’t think she could handle it, I won’t do it.

If she agrees and commits 100%, but ultimately fails due to neglect, I’d be super disappointed and may come up with an ultimatum. Though certainly not for everyone, I don’t necessarily think this mom in question was wrong for asking for her son to pay her back as he had made promises to her- as a young adult.

Would you ever ask your kids to pay back for such an expense?