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Are Parents Obligated to Pay for Their Children’s College Education?

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Group of students going to study on campus. Friends are walking around university. Happy Boys and girls. AI generated man and woman

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The soaring cost of higher education has sparked a complex debate: are parents obligated to pay for their children’s college expenses? This question touches on legal, financial, and ethical considerations that vary widely among families. While some view it as a parental duty to support their children’s academic aspirations, others believe that students should take responsibility for their own education. Understanding the nuances of this issue can help families navigate the expectations and responsibilities involved. The decision ultimately depends on individual circumstances and values.

1. Legal Perspectives

Legally, parents are generally not required to pay for their children’s college education once the child reaches the age of majority. However, in divorce or separation cases, some court orders may mandate educational support as part of child support agreements. These legal frameworks vary from state to state and country to country. It is important for parents to be aware of their legal obligations and rights. Consulting with a legal expert can provide clarity on this complex issue.

2. Financial Considerations

Many families use the concept of an Expected Family Contribution (EFC) to assess their ability to pay for college. While the EFC is primarily a tool for financial aid determination, it also reflects a family’s financial capacity. Parents must balance supporting their children’s education with their own financial well-being, including retirement savings. Open discussions about finances can help set realistic expectations for college funding. Each family’s situation is unique, requiring a personalized approach to financial planning.

3. Ethical and Emotional Factors

Beyond legal and financial obligations, many parents feel a moral duty to help their children succeed academically. Providing financial support can strengthen familial bonds and offer opportunities that might otherwise be unattainable. However, it is also important for children to learn financial responsibility and independence. The ethical balance involves ensuring that support does not foster dependency. Honest, ongoing conversations about money and expectations are key to maintaining mutual respect.

4. The Role of Scholarships and Loans

Scholarship. Piggy bank, graduate hat, books and coins on light grey table. Speech cloud with word coming out jar

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Encouraging children to apply for scholarships, grants, and student loans can alleviate some of the financial burdens on parents. Many students successfully secure funding that reduces the overall cost of education. This approach not only eases the financial strain but also teaches valuable lessons in self-reliance and resourcefulness. Combining parental support with external financial aid can create a balanced strategy. This model promotes shared responsibility in funding higher education.

5. Long-Term Family Goals

The decision to pay for college should be aligned with the family’s long-term financial goals. Supporting education is a significant investment, and parents must consider its impact on their overall financial health. Developing a comprehensive financial plan that includes education funding, retirement, and emergencies is essential. Balancing immediate educational needs with future stability requires careful thought. Collaborative planning can ensure that both educational aspirations and family security are maintained.

It’s A Deeply Personal Choice

Deciding whether to pay for your child’s college education is a deeply personal choice that encompasses legal, financial, and ethical dimensions. Open communication and careful planning are crucial in making a decision that works for your family. There is no one-size-fits-all answer, and each situation must be evaluated on its own merits. By considering all factors and discussing expectations, families can arrive at a solution that supports both educational success and long-term financial well-being.

What are your thoughts on this issue? Have you navigated this decision in your family? Share your insights in the comments below!

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College Doesn’t Have to Cost a Fortune

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Person Holding Their Graduation Cap in the Air

I have three children—one is attending a community college, and the other two are finishing up 7th and 8th grade. I have immersed myself in learning about the college application process and how to pay for college and get merit scholarships. What I am finding makes me a bit sad. So many students are taking out loans for tens of thousands of dollars, but college doesn’t have to cost a fortune.

We Won’t Take Out Parent Loans

My husband and I agree that we won’t take out parent loans for our children’s college. Every parent has to decide if they’re willing to go into debt for their children’s educations, and we’re not. My husband and I both attended graduate school and started our careers in our late twenties and early thirties, so we must make up for lost time regarding retirement. We are choosing to prioritize our retirement over our children’s education.

We’ll Encourage Our Children Not to Take Out Loans

Likewise, we encourage our children not to take out loans. But, if they must, we don’t want them to take out loans for more than $15,000 to pay for their four years of school.

Based on our own experiences, students tend to think they’ll pay off their student loans quickly, but then life interferes. The jobs they get after college may not pay as well as they thought they would, or they may want to start a family and find one person needs to pause their career to take care of the child. If they both continue to work, daycare can be expensive.

It’s better not to get loans at all, if possible. If not, keeping the loans to a minimum is important for our family. Federal student loans are often less expensive than private loans, so if your kids have to borrow, going with Uncle Sam is marginally better.

We Encourage Our Kids to Pursue Merit

We’re also encouraging our kids to pursue merit scholarships. Our son got a scholarship to a community college; the remainder of the balance for his tuition is low enough that my husband and I can pay it. Our son will not have any student loans during his first two years of college.

They’ll Stay Local If Necessary

Girl studying with a book on her lap

Our two younger children plan to apply to several colleges and see if they get merit aid. If they don’t, we’re lucky to have several colleges and universities within 30 minutes of our house. They will choose one of those schools rather than go into debt to pay for college.

Final Thoughts

Every family must decide what is best for their children when it comes to choosing a college and paying for it. However, college doesn’t have to cost a fortune. My husband and I have told our children how much money we have to help them through school. To make up for the difference, they’ll have to get merit aid or choose a local school. Using this plan, they should graduate with no or minimal debt, and my husband and I won’t have to take out any parent loans.

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3 Mistakes We Made in the College Process

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3 Mistakes We Made in the College Process

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Mistakes We Made in the College Process

First children are always the guinea pigs of the family. Parents experiment with them and learn how parenthood works. They understand that once you have children, life doesn’t always go as planned. Our oldest, who recently turned 18, is also our guinea pig when it comes to college. We’ve learned that there are significant mistakes we made in the college process with him. Luckily, we’re learning from these experiences, so hopefully, we’ll be smarter with the college process with our younger two children.

Not Having a Backup Plan

My husband and I have always worked in education. I worked at a community college until I quit after our third child was born, and my husband has worked at two different universities.

We didn’t have money to save for college when our kids were young, but we weren’t concerned because we knew that our children could receive a tuition discount if they went to college where my husband worked. Between that discount and the scholarship our son received, he could have lived at home and gone to college for free.

However, life doesn’t always work out as we plan.

Moving After His Senior Year

My husband had been looking for a job for the past 18 months. He had interviewed and made it to the final rounds for four different jobs. However, none worked out. He applied for one more this past February, and we decided if he didn’t get that one, we’d quit looking until after our oldest finished college.

Luckily, for my husband’s career, he got the job. However, the job required a move across the country. While the job pays much more than his current position, it’s not at a university, so we no longer have a college tuition discount.

In addition, our son hadn’t applied to any of the nearby colleges in the new location because we didn’t know we’d be here. He missed out on the prime time for college admissions and scholarships. Now, he’s stuck applying only 6 to 8 weeks before college begins.

Not Specifying How Much We Would Contribute

Mistakes We Made in the College Process

Some parents tell their children what amount they have to contribute to their college education. Then, the children can use that amount as a basis to help them determine which colleges they will attend based on affordability. We never had that discussion because we didn’t think we had to; our child knew he could get a substantial tuition discount.

Now, we don’t know how much we can afford to pay because we’re moving to a new geographic area of the country and still aren’t sure how much typical monthly expenses will be. That makes determining affordability difficult.

Final Thoughts

The three mistakes we made during the college process have made the experience more difficult for our son than it needed to be. We had a unique set of circumstances that, hopefully, won’t happen to our younger children.

However, we’ve learned from our mistakes and will now be saving for their college tuition and setting a limit for them that we can pay.

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Should Your Child Go to College This Year?

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Should Your Child Go to College This Year?

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A year ago, most college seniors first decided if they wanted to go to college or not.  If they did, they applied, and sometime in the spring received their acceptance letters and then chose what college they were going to attend.  In the fall, they attended that college.  In the age of coronavirus, that decision is no longer simple.  If you’re a parent of a graduating high school senior, you’re faced with tough choices.  Should your child go to college this year, or attend a community college instead, or just take a gap year?

Should Your Child Go to College This Year?

The Case for Not Going to a University

If you want to be safe, the obvious choice is to take a gap year or plan to attend the community college.

Should Your Child Go to College This Year?

Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

This spring when cases of COVID-19 started appearing, universities shut down and closed the dormitories.  There is a good chance that cases of COVID-19 will continue to increase.  How will universities handle that?  The trouble is that no university has specified their plan.

For many people, containing the uncertainty is a better option.  These people will have their children enroll in the local community college and live at home.  Others take a different route and are having their children take a gap year and start college not in the 20-21 school year, but in the 21-22 school year.  By then, they figure things will have settled back down to normal either through herd immunity or a vaccine.

Besides mitigating uncertainty, another reason to wait on going to a university is because attending college far from home is expensive.  Some students and their parents take out tens of thousands of dollars in student loans or make financial sacrifices to pay for university.  Do they really want to pay all of this money for online classes?  Then answer is no, which is why they’re opting out of university this year.

The Case for Going to a University

None of us have a crystal ball.  Maybe this pandemic will be gone in the fall.  Maybe colleges won’t be impacted.  Some people are betting on that, or that if their kids do get the virus, they won’t be that sick.  Others don’t want to put their education on hold for a variety of reasons.

My friend’s daughter plans to move 12 hours from home to attend university this year.  So far, the college plans to open in person, though she did receive a note that the semester would end early—at Thanksgiving break.

Likewise, my nephew, who got into a prestigious school in Japan, opted to start university this year.  So far, his classes have been all online and he’s sheltering in place in his dorm room.  This isn’t an optimal way to start a university career, but for him, academics are more important than socialization.

Final Thoughts

Should your child go to college this year?  Unfortunately, that’s a tough question to answer because so much remains unknown.  Luckily, I only have a rising high school junior, so we don’t have to make such tough decisions.  If we did, I think I would encourage him to stay closer to home because life as we used to know it doesn’t seem to be coming back anytime soon.

How To Afford Out-of-State Tuition

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how to make out of state tuition affordable

Every parent dreams of a full-ride scholarship for their child. I, personally, have high hopes on an Ivy League education. But full-ride scholarships aren’t always realistic. And what if your child wants to attend an out-of-state college?  

Out-of-state tuition can increase your education costs by over 100%. However, some options may make out-of-state tuition more affordable. 

Here are nine options to consider to make out-of-state tuition more affordable.

Flat Rate Tuition

Look for colleges that are on a flat-rate tuition policy. Flat rate tuition does not discriminate based on where you live; the cost is the same regardless of your residency.

An example of a university that charges the same tuition for in-state and out-of-state residents is Mississippi Valley University.

Student Exchange

Similar to studying abroad for a year, some schools allow an exchange to another university, for the same cost as your home school. Generally, these are available for one-year increments. Check out the National Student Exchange for more information.

Good Neighbor Policy

Neighboring states or counties may offer reduced tuition. It’s often not advertised, so it’s worth giving the financial aid office a call to ask what kind of assistance they can offer.

Low Out-of-State Tuition

Some colleges are cheaper than others, or the gap between in-state and out-of-state tuition is more narrow. West Texas A&M University in Canyon, Texas, is an example where the difference between in-state and out-of-state is less than $1,000 per year.

Waivers

Top performing students may be eligible for a non-resident tuition waiver. There may be certain restrictions, as every state has different regulations. For example, the student may need to be studying in a particular area. East Tennessee University has waiver options if you major in History. 

Reciprocity Agreements

Similar to good neighbor schools, some states hold agreements with other states to allow residents to swap states for the sake of saving on college tuition. The Western Undergraduate Exchange is an exchange of approximately 16 states on the West Coast that allow for reduced out-of-state tuition if you attend a school in one of the participating states. Deadlines are a big deal here – so make sure you apply early.

Legacy Scholarships

Legacy scholarships may be available for alumni of many colleges.

Tuition-Free Schools

In exchange for service, many schools offer free tuition. Alice Lloyd College in Kentucky is an example. Through a student work program, students may be eligible for free tuition. More schools are listed here.

Relocate

While not the most realistic of the options, it’s worth mentioning. Massive action produces massive results. If your child has their heart set on a specific school, and you have the flexibility to move – perhaps you work remote – this may be an option. It’s crucial to review residency requirements in each state as they often have loopholes that will hinder short term moves for the sake of paying in-state tuition.

 

Do you think out-of-state tuition is out of your reach? Share your concerns in the comments below.

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Are Parents Legally Obligated To Pay For College

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Are Parents Legally Obligated To Pay For College

In August 2013, a New Jersey girl sued her parents for the cost of her college tuition. Caitlyn Ricci won that case in 2014, and the decision was upheld in court later that year. The details of the lawsuit is worthy of soap opera. Amongst which is that Ms. Ricci is estranged from her parents for failure to follow the rules laid out by her parents. While we leave the legal merits of the case up to the judges, it begs the question, are parents are legally obligated to pay for college.

This topic is particularly personal for me. We save money for our children’s college. However, I don’t necessarily plan on spending that money on college. My parents didn’t pay for my college. The education I gained from that alone was worth as much as the cost of my degree.

There is No Hard and Fast Answer

While there is no black and white answer, there are some signs that point to yes, parents are expected to contribute financially to their children’s higher education. This may not always come in the form of payment for a child’s tuition; it can be through other means of financial support, such as providing housing or transportation.

The State You Live In Matters

The case referenced above was filed in the state of New Jersey, which is a progressive state in terms of state laws that have been established which define parental requirements in terms of financial contribution towards a college education.

Each state sets its own laws, and some states such as California are on the other end of the spectrum and limit parental obligations. Overall, there is no specific requirement for parents to pay for their children’s college education in most states. However, if a parent is divorced, this may be a game-changer.

It Will Depend On The Parents Marital Status

The obligation is more strict when the parents are divorced.

When a marriage ends in divorce, and parents and children get involved, the parent with custodial rights generally receives some sort of financial contribution from the other parent. This is agreed upon as part of the divorce settlement, and higher education costs are typically included in the agreement.

Again, each state will differ – here is a breakdown of requirements by state.

The Child Must Participate In The Cost

There is an expectation that the child should make a reasonable attempt to contribute to their college education. In the case referenced above, Ms. Ricci’s parents appealed on the grounds that she did not apply for all applicable scholarships and loans. The claim was ultimately rejected in favor of the parents due to the fact Ms. Ricci was emancipated from her parents. Thus she showed intent to be independent of her parents. The court applied that independence to financial support, as well.

 

Do you think parents should be legally obligated to pay for college? Are you planning to pay for yours? Share your opinion in the comments below.

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3 Creative Ways to Save for Your Child’s College Education

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saving for collegeWhen my child was only five weeks old we opened a registered education savings account for her.

Neither my husband or I had any financial help for our education from our parents and ended up taking on significant debt to pay for it. While our intentions are not to pay for everything she may need for post secondary education we will be saving and contributing to it somewhat.

What we save is what she will have at her disposal, we won’t be compromising our own financial goals to pay for her education but that doesn’t mean we won’t still be able to contribute a decent chunk of money towards her savings. It just means we have to get creative.

Here are three ways we’re saving for our daughters college education.

Ask For Money

Given that she is the first child born into the family in quite some time, she is well taken care of.

People love to buy her little gifts and shower her with affection. There is very little she actually needs as so we have made it very clear that especially while she is still so young and doesn’t know, that rather than people giving her unnecessary toys or gifts, that they contribute to her post secondary fund instead.

We would rather the $10-$20 invested and gaining compound interest for the next 16-18 years than a toy she will play with for a few days before it gets lost in the shuffle. While some people aren’t comfortable with giving money (and that’s fine) most people are more than happy to not worry about what to get her and hand us a little cash to deposit on her behalf. This saves mom and dad on toy space and helps contribute to one of the best gifts she’ll ever receive, a good education.

Sell Their Stuff

Some things we’re holding onto for potential future children but other stuff we plan on selling. We just don’t have the room to store every item of clothing or every toy that enters our house. Given that these things were purchased for her, the money made from the sale should be reinvested into her. In our case we will be putting monies gained from selling her stuff into her education fund.

Have Them Save Their Own Money

While she’s so young we obviously manage her money now but in the not so distant future she will be managing her own. Birthday gifts, babysitting money and part-time jobs will give her a cashflow she will need to manage herself (with our guidance obviously).

Once she starts being responsible for her own money it will be important that she starts saving for things she wants, especially her education. We will teach her the importance of helping save towards her own goals, even if they seem impossibly far away. While she’s a kid living under our roof there will be very little that she will need so it will be expected that most of her money go into savings. I’m confident she will thank us on her graduation day!

Though not every kid pursues post secondary education it is money that needs to be in place in case they do because it can be a very costly venture if there are no funds in place, trust me, I know.