Kids Ain't Cheap

But They Sure Are Worth It

When Is the Right Time to Tell Your Child They Are Adopted?

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Happy young couple spending time with their daughter in nature

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Adoption is a beautiful journey that shapes a family’s story, yet one of the most sensitive topics is determining the right time to tell a child about their adoption. Parents often worry about causing confusion or hurt feelings, but research shows that early, honest conversations can lead to a stronger, more secure identity for the child.

Being open about adoption from a young age helps normalize it as a natural part of who they are. The challenge lies in delivering this information in a way that is age-appropriate and loving. Experts suggest that integrating the story of adoption into everyday conversations can lay a solid foundation for trust.

1. Start the Conversation Early

Many adoption specialists recommend beginning the conversation in early childhood. Introducing simple concepts about family and belonging can help children understand that being adopted is just one part of their unique story. Early disclosure avoids the shock factor that may occur if the child learns later in life. It sets the stage for a positive, ongoing dialogue about identity. This gradual approach builds a secure sense of self.

2. Use Age-Appropriate Language

Tailoring the conversation to the child’s developmental stage is crucial. For younger children, simple and clear language works best. As they grow older, more details can be shared to satisfy their curiosity. This method ensures the information is comprehensible and not overwhelming. It also encourages them to ask questions and engage in meaningful discussion about their background.

3. Normalize Adoption as Part of Family Life

Frame adoption as one of many ways families are formed. Emphasize that all families are unique, regardless of how they came together. Sharing positive stories about adoption can help dispel any stigma and build pride in their identity. This normalization helps children feel secure and valued. It reinforces the idea that adoption is a loving, intentional choice.

4. Maintain Ongoing Communication

Portrait of modern happy family chatting while sitting at table in luxury cafe and waiting for food, copy space

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Adoption disclosure should not be a one-time event but an ongoing conversation. As your child matures, revisit the topic and provide more context as needed. This continuous dialogue ensures they feel comfortable and supported in exploring their identity. It also offers a safe space to ask questions and express emotions. Consistency in communication strengthens trust and understanding.

5. Seek Professional Guidance

If you’re uncertain about how to approach the subject, consider seeking advice from a counselor or adoption specialist. Professional guidance can provide tailored strategies that suit your child’s needs. It can also prepare you for any emotional responses and help you navigate challenging questions. Leveraging expert advice ensures that the conversation is handled with care and sensitivity. This support is invaluable in fostering a positive outcome.

Telling Your Child They Are Adopted Is A Complex Decision

Deciding when to tell your child they are adopted is a personal and complex decision. Early and honest communication, tailored to your child’s developmental stage, fosters trust and a healthy sense of self. By integrating the story of adoption into everyday life and seeking professional guidance when needed, you can help your child embrace their unique identity with pride. Open, ongoing dialogue is the key to a secure and loving relationship.

What are your thoughts on the best time to discuss adoption with children? Share your insights and experiences in the comments below!

Read More:

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5 Baby Names That Have Been Banned Worldwide

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Portrait of a cute newborn baby who lies on his back in a crib

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Some baby names raise eyebrows—others raise legal concerns. Around the world, certain governments have stepped in to restrict names they believe are inappropriate, offensive, or just plain confusing. Whether it’s for cultural sensitivity, religious respect, or protecting the child from lifelong ridicule, these bans reveal just how seriously some countries take naming laws. While most parents want a name that’s unique or meaningful, it’s worth knowing there are limits in some places. These real-life examples might make you think twice before getting too creative with the birth certificate.

1. Nutella – France

In 2015, a French court ruled against naming a baby “Nutella.” The judge argued that naming a child after a chocolate spread would subject her to mockery and unnecessary ridicule. France has a long-standing history of regulating baby names to protect children’s well-being. The judge renamed the child “Ella” instead, stating it was more in the child’s best interest. While quirky names might feel fun, this case shows how far the law will go to protect a child from future embarrassment.

2. Brfxxccxxmnpcccclllmmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116 – Sweden

Yes, that’s a real name attempt—though not one that lasted long. A Swedish couple submitted this unpronounceable jumble in protest of the country’s strict naming laws. Sweden requires names to not cause offense or discomfort, and this one clearly didn’t pass the test. The parents said it was to challenge the system, but the government wasn’t amused and rejected the name outright. It’s a reminder that even naming protests have limits in the eyes of the law.

3. Talula Does the Hula from Hawaii – New Zealand

This name sounds like a punchline, but it was no joke for the child who bore it. A New Zealand court intervened and gave the girl a new name, saying the original name caused her social struggles and embarrassment. New Zealand is known for banning names that resemble titles, numbers, or overly long phrases. This name made headlines and sparked debates about parental rights versus child welfare. The judge made it clear: creativity shouldn’t come at the expense of a child’s dignity.

4. Akuma – Japan

In Japan, one couple attempted to name their son “Akuma,” which translates to “Devil.” Government officials quickly stepped in and deemed the name inappropriate for a child. The name sparked outrage among citizens and was eventually banned to prevent psychological and social harm. In Japanese culture, names carry deep spiritual and societal weight, making “Akuma” especially problematic. This example shows how language, culture, and social norms shape what’s considered acceptable.

5. @ – China

One Chinese couple tried to name their child “@” (yes, the symbol). They claimed it was meaningful and pronounced similarly to “love him” in Chinese. But the government rejected it, stating that names must consist of characters from the Chinese language. The move sparked global curiosity, but ultimately, China emphasized the importance of language integrity. This shows that even symbols we use daily aren’t fair game when it comes to baby names.

Where Do We Draw the Line?

Cute baby girl on a white bed at home

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Naming your child can be one of the most meaningful decisions a parent makes. But these banned names show how some choices can cross cultural or legal boundaries. While creativity is encouraged, it’s important to balance that with your child’s future experience. Governments often step in not to limit expression but to protect children from lasting harm or ridicule. So, before you go too far off the grid with a name, consider how it might sound not just at birth—but in adulthood too.

Would you ever support legal limits on baby names? Why or why not? Share your thoughts in the comments—let’s hear what you think!

Read More:

5 Baby Names That Are Associated with Luxury Brands

15 Baby Names Handed Down From The Rich to The Poor

Is a Pet a Good Idea For Your Family?

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Is a pet a good idea for your family? Here are some questions to ask before venturing into pet ownership.Anytime my three year old sees a dog she either asks if she can have that one, or if we can get another dog to live with us. As a fellow animal lover, she comes by wanting it honestly but we simply cannot have a dog for a number of different reasons but this doesn’t stop her from asking.

A pet is a huge responsibility, especially a dog. One of the big reasons I wouldn’t bring a dog into our lives right now is because we have an incredibly stressed out cat who suffers from IBS and I’m sure the stress of any other animal in the house would be enough to set off her IBS bad enough that it kills her. It would be totally unfair for us to do that to her.

I’ve always had pets growing up, cats, fish, hamsters, birds and dogs. We were big into animals but now that I’m a homeowner, mother and pet caretaker I have a totally different perspective on animals and the responsibility that comes with it. We can’t even go away overnight without having our cat looked after since she’s on such a strict feeding schedule.

So many families take on the responsibility of a pet without thinking it through and it doesn’t always end well. There are a few things that need to be considered before you bring any pet into the picture, regardless of your family situation.

Can you afford it?

Pets are expensive. To properly care for an animal they, at the very least, need regular food and exams. Expect extras too, in our case it’s expensive prescription cat food and multiple vet visits per year. All of these expenses need to fit into our budget. The cost of owning a pet goes beyond simply paying the pet store or adoption agency the initial fee.

Does it work for your family lifestyle?

Even before we had kids a pet like a dog wouldn’t work for us. We’re not home enough and for an animal like a dog, which needs to be let out regularly and walked, we simply can’t do it. We also like to travel, even just to see family for a weekend, and a dog wouldn’t work. Consider your day-to-day schedule and see how owning a pet wold impact it. If you can’t make it work fairly for both you and animal it’s not a good time.

Who will care for the animal?

Another huge reason we won’t have a dog anytime soon is because my husband doesn’t have much interest in caring for one. He’s being fair and honest. I would hate for him to push me to have one leading me on to believe he’d help when I know it’s not something he’s interested in right now. With busy careers and a toddler running around I don’t want to be stuck doing everything myself which is precisely how it will be. For years my mom wouldn’t allow my sister to get a hamster because she knew very well she wouldn’t do stuff like clean it’s cage so until she proved herself she didn’t get one.

Pets take up more time and energy than I think most families realize. While I totally sympathize with wanting all things cute and fuzzy, unless you’re prepared to care for the pet on all fronts it may not be the best plan for your family. It can just lead to unnecessary stress.

Baby or Career: Which Should You Choose?

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Obviously, this is a highly subjective question. However, we need to realize the fact that there are many factors of importance that we simply have to take into account. There are various interesting options that are available and that we tend to dismiss in life when it comes to the career because of the fact we want a baby. The exact opposite also applies.

Take a look at the stats that are included in the infographic presented. You will quickly see that there are some things that you did not know anything about. The infographic may help you to make that final decision you have been postponing for a long time as you were confused: baby or career?

Gumtree infographic baby versus career
Gumtree infographic baby versus career is an infographic that was produced by Gumtree

Fit Families: Being Active Doesn’t Have to Cost Money

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fit familiesGrowing up, activity was second nature to me. I’d wake up, go outside and play until the sun went down and repeat the next day. I was involved in some organized sports, but for the most part, unless it was pouring rain there was an expectation on me to be active.

The level of inactivity in today’s general population, especially children is alarming. I live on a street full of children and I can count on one hand the amount of times I have seen them actually playing outside. While this doesn’t necessarily mean they’re not involved in organized activity outside of the home, it still concerns me. Unless it is pouring rain, I make sure my daughter gets outside and explores everyday. I want activity to be ingrained in her little brain.

A friend of mine recently started complaining about how her overweight son (who is 11) was never going to lose weight because she couldn’t afford to enroll him in an organized sport. Overweight herself, she claims to be determined to not have him lead the life she has as an overweight adult. When I told her I thought ”not being able to afford organized sport” was a poor excuse, she was taken aback.  And don’t even get me started on a junk food tax.

Though organized sports and activity hold many benefits in many aspects, they are not the only ways to get active and fit.

 

Free or Inexpensive Activities for Families

Families who are active together are generally much happier as a whole and individual parts. I can tell you I always feel much better mentally and physically when my whole family gets out together rather than being alone or even me and the little one. Having my husband present is encouraging and fun. Activity is an amazing bonding time for everyone.

Some free or inexpensive activity ideas for the whole family include:

  • Walking or hiking, exploring your neighborhood or local parks,
  • Biking
  • Playing in the snow, snowshoes, skiing, building snowmen are always fun.
  • Family sport game (baseball, tennis, soccer)
  • Play on the beach, running in the sand, building sand castles.
  • Swimming
  • Walk the family dog together
  • Rake leaves, clean the yard, garden together (for more fun jump in the leave piles!)
  • Play electronic games. Electronic games (Wii, xBox, Playstation) can be fun when played as a family, there are many games that encourage activity.
  • Run, there are many family friendly races that you could train and run together.

When activity is a component of your life, you feel better in all aspects of your life. You have more focus and are generally more organized and in a better mood. Nothing bad ever comes from being active together. Being active as a family means you are setting your children up for a healthier life than leading an inactive childhood. When children see their parents active they are also more apt to partake in activity.

Being fit a fit family doesn’t have to include fancy gym memberships or organized sports. There’s nothing stopping you from exploring the world around you and having fun while doing it!

Do you consider yourself to be active? How about your family?

Funeral Insurance is More Important than You May Think

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Funeral InsuranceThroughout all of life’s ups and downs, there are a few things you can be certain of:

  • You will have to pay taxes
  • You will endure many changes and seasons of change as you grow older
  • You will eventually pass away

While death is certainly a sensitive topic to most, careful consideration should be taken to ensure your final days are spent filled with love, family and friends instead of accountants, bills and funeral directors.

With a bit of pre-planning, you can make sure all of your final arrangements are taken care of long before those emotional last hours. You can also rest peacefully knowing that your loved ones won’t be left with any financial burden by purchasing funeral insurance.

 

What is Funeral Insurance?

Also known as burial or final expense insurance, funeral insurance is a type of life insurance policy that covers the costs associated with your end of life arrangements. These can include everything from caskets and funeral home costs to flowers and burial plots in the cemetery.

Policies typically range in value from $5,000 to $50,000 and are left in the control of a designated beneficiary who will organize, and pay for, your final arrangements as you specify.

 

Tips for Buying Funeral Insurance

First and foremost, don’t purchase a policy that’s unnecessary. This may be the case if your current life insurance policy covers funeral expenses (or perhaps you already have money saved for these costs). Once you’ve identified that funeral insurance is a purchase you’d like to make, check the laws in your state and city, discuss your plans with your family, and research a few different brokerages and coverage options before committing to one.

You should also set up a meeting with a funeral director at the home you plan to have your final arrangements carried out. Also, make sure to take advantage of the “free look” period (the first 30-60 days of your policy) so you’re 100% confident this is the policy you need and like. If there’s something wrong or you’ve changed your mind, you can legally cancel the policy and get your money back!

 

When it’s Time to Buy

The first step of the buying process should be to have everything put into writing. Ensure that your wishes are clearly stated and the various components of your arrangements are clearly listed in the contracts. Finally, make sure all documents are signed in your presence!

Do you have funeral insurance?

Family Business Where Kids Can Help

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family businessFinding affordable childcare can be a challenge. Because of this, many people are looking for a job that they can do with their kids. While many of these jobs are done from home, there are a few jobs that allow you to bring the kids with you.

The following employment ideas include jobs where you work for another person and business opportunities that the whole family can work on together. In the case of the businesses, it’s recommended that a family try out the idea before the parent or parents make the decision to quit their job.mmFor people who have little money for start-up costs, there are a lot of financing options. Business loans are the most common financing route, but they typically require a person to have a good credit history. A bad credit business loan can be taken out by people who are in this situation.

 

Education

The majority of day care centers, as well as many private schools allow their workers to bring their kids to work with them. In the case of many day care centers, the employees are offered free care for their children as part of the benefits package. Depending on the center’s rules, the children are allowed to stay in the same room where their parent works.

Many schools allow the children of their teachers and other staff (such as cafeteria workers) to attend classes there. In the case of private schools, this is considered to be one of the main benefits of the job by many of the people who work there. While children are often not allowed to be in the same classroom in which their parent teaches, they are often just a few feet away.

 

Home Based Businesses

Parents who choose to work from home and/or who own their own business have a lot of flexibility with their schedules and they can often plan to bring their kids to work with them.

For example, there are a lot of home-based craft and baking businesses that are operated out of homes. Start-up costs for most craft businesses typically just consist of the craft materials or ingredients themselves as well as some basic advertising. Depending on their age and ability, young kids can sort materials, attach price tags, and even assemble simple parts.

Older children can help out by photographing the items made and creating listings for them on internet sites such as etsy and craigslist. Kids of all ages can accompany their parent to the flea markets, swap meets, and farmer’s markets where the parents sell their goods. In fact, many parents site these places as a good way to teach their kids about the basics of a retail business. Kids learn good math skills, as well as how to interact with other people and a variety of sales skills.

Yaaaa, We Sold Our House… We Hope

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Since the house sold, we don't need these for-sale signs anymore

Copyright Andy Beecroft and licensed for reuse under this Creative Commons License.

If you have been reading this blog for any length of time you may have read one of the posts about the years we spent fixing our credit, the months we spent slaving away fixing up our house and getting it ready for the market and then finally listing it for sale. It’s only been on the market for 2 months but all that work paid off. I am very happy to report that we have accepted an offer on our house and will close in time for Harrison to start Kindergarten in our new school district.

That was a big concern of ours. Harrison isn’t as sociable as his younger brother and we really didn’t want to have to start him in one school district and then pull him out and have him finish in another school. I know at that age it’s not a big deal but as parents, we didn’t want it. We wanted Harrison to start on even footing with the rest of the kids.

In this current housing marketing, we couldn’t be happier with how quickly our house sold. We live in a semi-detached house on a busy road. It’s a great starter home but still, being right on a major road, we had our work cut out for us which is why we put so much effort into getting it to look as good as it possibly can. Based on the feedback we received from the people who walked through the house, it definitely paid off.

When we got the news the house was sold

What was even more special is when we got the news. We were on vacation with my wife’s family when our Realtor called. We were down in North Carolina at the Outer Banks. It was great, throughout the week people came and went but most of the immediate family was there. Her Mom, her sister, her sisters children, her cousins, her aunts and uncles, it was great. Some husbands would find that to be a nightmare but I love her family and get along quite well with them. My own parents didn’t get along with their in-laws and I always hated it. When I met my wife I told her pretty early on I wouldn’t get serious with anyone if I couldn’t get along with their family. Luckily for both of us, we both get along with each others family splendidly.

So, what does that have to do with us selling our house? Well, we are buying my Mother-In-Laws house and what is even more special is most of the houses in the area are the relatives we were on vacation with. Stephanie comes from a good farming family. They aren’t all farmers but some of them bought pieces of the farm property and built houses so they all live on beautiful pieces of property surrounded by loved ones and country landscape. We got to immediately celebrate the news with the person we were buying the house from and our new neighbors all at once. It was great and everyone was so excited.

I can’t wait to move on to this next chapter of our lives. Let’s just hope everything goes smoothly with settlement.

Have you ever sold a house? What was your experience with it?

Little Girl Can’t Let Go as Father Prepares for Deployment

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Wow, what a powerful and incredibly sweet picture.  The solder next to the little girl is a local.  He lives and raises his family in my part of the country.  When the local paper ran this picture, I just about cried.  It’s so sweet and powerful.  Having a little 4 year old girl in formation is against Army regulations but not a single man there was strong enough or heartless enough to tell that little girl she couldn’t stand by her fathers side as he prepared to deploy overseas.  You can read the full article in my local paper here

Salute.

Doesn’t a story like this just warm your heart? Do you know of any other examples like this?

Tips for Raising a Family on a Budget

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Families need a budget to keep in check the flood of expenses

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Smart spending is a practical approach to handling the family’s finances. It is also a great practice to pass on to your children.  Some things you can do to raise a family on a budget really boils down to a lot of practicality and common sense. For me, it is all about knowing what the important things are- the things you need, the things you want, and the things you can live without.

Make sure you can afford your home

First, it would be good idea to look at where you are living or where you want to live. Live in a house you can afford.  Ok, it might not be the house of your dreams just yet but you will be able to reroute the money to other items that are more important at the moment. You can also check out different online platforms such as HousingAnywhere Barcelona, or elsewhere, to find affordable living spaces. This can make it easier to find a variety of choices to suit your needs and budgets so that you can find a comfortable place to live without financial strain. I live in a small townhouse with reasonable rent and it is not the house I want to stay in forever but it is more than enough for my two kids.  They feel safe, happy, and comfortable here and that is great.

Limit waste

Make sure to limit wastage of any kind. I really try to live by this. Switch off lights when not needed and limit the use of electricals when you can.  I live in a tropical country so it is often important to have an air conditioner at home.  The use is timed though, very strictly. And during cooler months like now, we use the ac to cool the room rather then use a ventilator.  This really cuts down the electricity bill.

Do you need that car?

If you own two cars, consider having just one.  If you are going to purchase a car, do this on a cash basis so you don’t have installment payments with interest to look after in the coming months. You may have to buy a second hand car but this will be good enough to get you to where you need to go. I do without a car at all. I use public transportation and I find that this is saving me money even if it is harder.  I plan to get a car but only when I can afford its maintenance and gas prices.

Budget!

Start every year with a budget. I’ve blogged about this ad nauseum but I really think budgeting is essential. Be sure to include occasions like birthdays and Christmas, where you are sure to spend a bit of money.  But when these occasions come, stay within your budgeted amount. Remember, it isn’t the cost but the thought that counts.  You should also set priorities with your budget, such as funding a college or a custodial account for your kids, and saving for your own retirement.  This is an important lesson your kids will learn as well.

Live on cash

Live on cash.  I really advocate this.  We do not need to focus too much on credit here, unlike in other countries, so this is really easy to do.  But, if you must use your credit cards, pay them all off every month.  If you only have your house to pay off, you will have a much easier time.

Limit expenses

Finally, forgo repeated extra expenses like outings and meals outside. Include these in your budget but remember that you don’t always have to spend to have a good time.  A home-cooked meal and a rented DVD, a treasured story book from the library, other good books and toys from garage sales, an afternoon picnic in the park are all things and activities that cost very little money but make for wonderful teaching moments and warm memories with the kids.  Plus, think of all the money you can save for a college fund!  My kids enjoy watching Barney on YouTube in my room as the movie of the night.  They also enjoy simple sheets of stickers and pieces of candy as great prizes.  Raising kids to like simple things helps make a budget work as well.

Now, raising a family on a budget isn’t easy. It is often very hard to resist buying that thing you have been eyeing but not really needing or giving in to the times and getting a computer game or something similar for the kids.  But resisting has made a tight budget work for a small family.  We are better than ok. When you see how well your kids are learning about the value of resources and how happy they will be with what you are providing, you will feel satisfaction unlike anything else ever.  I hope to increase my earnings to have a bigger budget, of course, but I am so grateful that I can provide what I am providing now.  It’s something to feel proud about, in my opinion.

How do you save money to raise your family?