Parenting Archives - Page 88 of 92

Have You Ever Considered Having a Mommy Card Made?

March 2, 2016 | Leave a Comment

I remember a few years ago reading about this new trend in the parenting world dubbed ‘’Mommy Cards’’. It’s a business-type card which contains all your basic mommy (or daddy) information for another parent/teacher/coach /babysitter to contact you.

Your name and who’s parent you are
Phone number(s)
E-mail address
Some versions also contain photos of you and/of the kids, parent’s social media contact info and other pertinent info about your kid like allergies.
Never put your home address with all this above mentioned information because it could become a safety risk if card were to be placed in wrong hands. Also all social media accounts should always be on highest privacy setting.

I have to be honest, I thought it was a joke the first time I heard about them. I’m not sure whose idea it was, a parent or a printing company looking to make more money, but the whole idea seemed silly and like a colossal waste of money. In the last few months though my tune is starting to change and I’m seriously considering jumping on the Mommy Card train.

Why I’m Considering Getting a Mommy Card

As my daughter begins to get involved in her own extracurricular activities, I find myself engaging in conversations with other parents. This past weekend I talked to two other moms while our daughters were in ballet class for over an hour. We started talking about mutual contacts and birthday party ideas for our kids’ upcoming birthdays. Because our kids aren’t in school yet the relationships they make are coming from places like dance class and soccer. I have my daughter asking me to invite her new friends to her birthday and I don’t even know the moms names yet.

Many times already I find myself looking for scrap paper to jot down my contact info to give to another parent for similar reasons. I’ve had a few of my daughters friends parents find me on Facebook and reach out to me that way but without knowing our last name or my email address this isn’t always possible. I’m already envisioning in a few years dropping my daughter off to a birthday party or other event where we’re not present and how much easier it would be if I had something like one of these parental contact cards to carry with me.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not a big deal (at all) to jot down the info on a scrap of paper when needed, but having one of these cards makes the info just seem a little more important or something. I know I personally would be more likely to take care of a business card than I would a crumpled up receipt with a note written on the back.

As my daughter gets more and more involved in things, and gains more and more contacts of her own, I feel like these cards could play a part in my role as her mom and keeping as many contacts as possible. Are they a necessity? No, but sometimes the silliest of things, in this case a ‘’Mommy Card’’ can solve an easy problem.

Have you heard of Mommy (or Daddy) Cards before? What do you think of the concept?

Photo Credit: summer78 / 123RF Stock Photo

Catherine

Catherine is a first time momma to a rambunctious toddler. When she isn’t soaking up all that motherhood has to offer, you can find her blogging over at Plunged in Debt where she chronicles her and her husbands journey out of debt. You can also follow her on Twitter.

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Keeping up with the Joneses (Parenting Edition)

February 24, 2016 | Leave a Comment

At the beginning of the year, my daughter started ballet. Halfway through the semester they have a public showcase which is a time where the families can see what is being accomplished in class and, as well a time for the students to get used to being outside of their studio and on a larger stage with an audience. By the time their annual recital comes around they’re a little more comfortable on a stage and know what to expect.

The showcase is not the full practiced recital with costumes and all. We were excited to see her dance though (parents aren’t allowed in the studio during weekly dance class to encourage independence/the studios aren’t very big) and she was excited to show off her moves. I was a little surprised to find out, that during this less formal performance, that parents would be bringing flowers to their kids. I didn’t know what to do.

For a formal dance recital performance, I understand that parents might bring a flower or small bouquet for a job well done and to congratulate their kids, but for a mid-semester quick showcase I wasn’t so sure. This was my first time so I was very much ‘’going with the flow’’. In the end, I decided that flowers for this day would be a bit much and were unnecessary, that was until I got a text from my sister-in-law.

Her friend has a daughter I the same dance company as ours. He called her to warn her that when they went to their first showcase they were literally the only parents without flowers for their daughter and it was nothing but tears for a few hours following. I didn’t want that to be us. I didn’t want to walk into the dressing room afterwards empty handed and have to explain in a roomful of pre-schoolers and parents that mommy and daddy didn’t bother getting flowers because they were a waste of money for such an event. We didn’t have time so our family made an emergency flower stop and picked up a small bouquet (50% off!).

This was the first time since having my daughter that I really felt like I was doing something to appease other people. Parents mostly. Don’t get me wrong, she was pretty excited to get a few flowers of her own, but I still feel like it was a bit unnecessary for the event in question. Had we not got the call from my sister-in-law, I would have stuck to my instinct and my kid would have been the only one (without flowers) and possibly spent the drive home crying, so in the end I’m glad we avoided that.

I’ve always very much gone to the beat of my own drum, and not cared what other people think about me, my family or any choices we make but I notice more and more that my thought process around my daughter to be more concerning with what other people will think. I think it’s partly because she’s not quite at an age to fully understand things. Sure we could have skipped the flowers and I could have attempted to explain that we only get them for recitals but she wouldn’t have really understood why she didn’t get any while everyone else did.

As she gets older and more understanding I think it will be easier to explain why we may do (or do not) certain things but for now I choose my battles.

Have you ever felt pressure to do something for your kids?

Catherine

plungedindebt.com

Why I Say No.

November 11, 2015 | Leave a Comment

A few weeks ago Huffington Post shared an article about the Benefits of Saying No. Today I share my reasoning for telling my toddler ‘No’ more times than ‘Yes’, and why rewarding for good behaviour is foolish.

I bring my daughter everywhere. Unless it’s not appropriate, she comes with us most places. I have friends who plan all their errands around their spouses schedule so the ‘kids aren’t getting dragged around’ while they do things like get groceries or go to appointments. I get it, it’s usually a whole lot easier to do some tasks like grocery shop when you don’t have grabby little hands asking for everything, but to me these are important opportunities for my daughter to learn about the world around her.

Not Rewarding Good Behaviour

I don’t believe in rewarding for good behaviour when good behaviour is expected. For us, I completely expect her to behave in a situation like grocery shopping. She does it so often with us, she knows what is expected of her. If we however brought her to a meeting at a bank and had her trapped in a tiny room for three hours, acting out might be expected. See the difference? Bribes and treats might be needed in the second scenario!

Just because she knows how to behave, doesn’t mean she doesn’t try to ask for things almost every time we go out though. The difference is that when we say no, she usually doesn’t push the issue. As each outing happens, there are fewer and fewer ‘incidences’. I honestly can’t remember the last time she put up any fight about hearing the dreaded two letter word.

Thanks to advertising, today while grocery shopping my daughter ran up and grabbed a massive container or Minions tic-tacs. She didn’t even know what they were, but wanted them because they were cute and yellow. Rather than freak out when I told her no, she said ‘’ok mommy’’ and put them back.

Over the many, many trips to the grocery store and running errands with us, she had come to learn that just because she asks for something doesn’t mean she will get it and this makes our life so much easier.

Every now and then we’ll buy her a treat but it’s usually on our accord and not when she asks for it. When we’re done errands I might suggest a treat of getting a donut for her and coffee for mommy. We’ll sit in and talk for a few minutes. I know she will enjoy this time together so much more than a random treat she eats in the car.

The stuff she wants is usually pretty cheap and harmless. Rarely does she ask for something that cost more than $2-$3. That’s not that point though. I want her to grow up understanding that she won’t get everything she asks for just because she wants it. Life isn’t that fair. Though I want my kid to have the world I want her to understand balance too and I never want her to feel like she literally has everything in the world she’s ever asked for, it’s totally unrealistic and unhealthy in my mind.

We enjoy giving special treats and surprises just as much as any parent does but by learning to say No more times than Yes, I really believe that she really appreciates things a lot more.

Catherine

plungedindebt.com

Cleaning Poop and Other Jobs Your Kid Can Do This Summer to Earn Money

July 1, 2015 | Leave a Comment

A few weeks ago as I was getting my daughter ready for bed there was a knock at the door. It was two kids, about 14 asking to mow our lawn. My husband was already planning to do it the next day so I thanked them and gave my apologies.

They looked totally defeated. They obviously hadn’t had any luck and had been lugging their lawnmower all over the neighbourhood looking for someone to help. My husband felt bad, went outside and asked their price. For $15 they would cut both the front and back yard, $20 and they would add in the whippersnipper. We did it.

Did we need to, absolutely not, we’re both able-bodied and can mow our own lawn but these kids were looking to earn some cash of their own and we wanted to help.

The summer can be a great opportunity for kids of all ages to earn some extra money. What they use the money for will vary but there are many opportunities for kids to have a little hustle of their own with their free time. Here are a few ideas to help your kids start-up a little side-gig:

Lawn mowing: This is an easy one but start in neighbourhood where there is a knowing aging population, a group who would benefit from the help the most. Make simple flyers and hand them out. The biggest downside is how weather dependant it is.

Yard Sale: My sister and I used to do this all the time. We would gather items and ask our mom to help pick stuff out for us to sell. We’d make a few signs the morning of and hope for the best. We’ve also rented tables for $10 at flea markets to sell. This isn’t usually consistent income but helps unload stuff and make a lump-sum of cash.

Yard Cleaning: This is something I searched online for the year we moved into our house. After we demolished an old shed on our property I contemplated hiring someone, ideally a cheap young high school kid, for a few hours to help clean the area up and prep it for a garden, only problem was that I couldn’t find anyone! There is always yard work that is needed and that people need and want help with.

Clean poop: Sounds gross but someone has to do it. There are companies dedicated to cleaning the dog poop from your property especially in the spring when the snow melts but it really is a task that needs to be maintained. If your kid is eager enough they could probably make a decent income for the upfront cost of good gloves, a mask, some buckets/bags and a rake.

Dog Walk/Pet Sit: People travel in the summer and the pets sometimes need a place to stay or for someone to check up on them. If your teen is attentive enough, and good with animals, it might be a lucrative summer career that can stretch beyond the summer months.

Until kids are of the legal working age it can be hard to earn income of their own. With a little effort and determination they may have luck in one of these areas to help them earn some money to put towards their own wants and needs.

Catherine

plungedindebt.com

Three Inexpensive Spring Break Ideas

March 18, 2015 | Leave a Comment

The month of March usually means a spring break for kids, and parents. I was floored when a parent told me they were spending $1,000 for their kid to go to a specialty camp for the week. One thousand dollars. Wow. We’re three years away from our first spring break but with prices like that I’ll need to start saving now if we want her to do anything!

Neither my husband nor I have the ability to easily step away from our job so when spring break does happen we may be able to take a day or two but I already know we will need to get creative with what we do with our daughter for the week. Luckily we have a lot of amazing friends and family who we can enlist to help! If you don’t have an army of people to call upon, there are still plenty of things to do that doesn’t include a $10,000 trip out of town and contending with massive crowds.

Museums

I admit that growing up I thought museums were boring. I don’t live in a huge city but we have a few small museums that cater to kids during spring break. Most often you can spend entire days there doing day camps, for free. The most expensive camp I could find was $10 for the day per child and this included a lunch and supplies for the day, totally reasonable. Look around at different museums and see if they offer anything special during spring break and what the details are (sometimes drop off isn’t allowed and you need to provide supervision sort-of-thing).

Plan a fun day at Home

I have a memory during one of my spring breaks growing up with a day spent with my babysitter. She came over for the day and told my sister and I that we were having a movie day since it was pouring rain out. We built a massive fort with blankets, pillows and couch cushions, all hung out and watched movies and ate popcorn. It was simple and cheap! Plan a fun day at home depending on your kid’s ages and interests. Obviously if the weather is nice, getting outside is always enjoyable.

Check out a local Library

Though kids may be reluctant to go anywhere near a book during their spring break, libraries, like museums often have fun activities going on. I know our local library has everything from a ‘’meet the princess day’’ for toddlers to a computer programing class for older kids. Classes fill up fast so check them out early.

As a parent, the thought of spending a week pushing through busy crowds somewhere like Disney World does not appeal to me at all. I’d rather save my travel budget for different (and cheaper) time of year and enjoy a quite spring break at home!

Catherine

plungedindebt.com

Why I’m Glad with My Decision to Put my Child in Daycare

January 14, 2015 | Leave a Comment

Last week my daycare provider contacted me about being a reference or another potential family. One of her kids is getting ready to leave in the spring and interviews for the open spot have started. I couldn’t be happier to provide the reference since I am so happy with my experience in her caring for our daughter while we’re at work, pursuing our careers.

I’m of the opinion that a mother should never have to choose between a career and a family. I have never wanted anymore more than to be a mother but I also feel like I have a lot to offer my community in my career. Life is about balance and for me that’s balancing motherhood and my job. With both my husband and I working, me four days per week, him five, daycare was essential.

I already wrote about my process for choosing our provider but never talked about the positive experiences we’ve experienced since she started, 19 months ago.

She Gets to Play with Other Kids

Our daughter is our only child. When she is home with us, she gets undivided attention which, as an only child, has its pros and cons. Other than her dad and I, she has no playmates at home. While we love playing with her, interaction with other children is crucial. I love watching her interact with her peers. I see natural qualities in her (like leadership and silliness) come out that I believe get masked at home playing with her much older parents. The fact that she gets to go to someone’s home and play with two other kids her age, four days a week, makes me happy. She has so much fun.

She Gets Used to Outside Authority

No two parents, parent the same way. I enjoy having diversity in her upbringing. I like having an added variation in authority for her to get used to. Life will throw millions of different personality traits at her in meeting and dealing with new people, starting young can only help this.

She is Safe and Loved

My husband and I don’t know everything. We’re first-time parents. The woman who is caring for her not only has two children of her own but has cared for many children over the years. She is far more experienced in parenting than I will likely ever be. I genuinely appreciate what her babysitter brings to the table in terms of her parenting abilities. She is a loving, sweet woman who cares for our daughter as one of her own, I could never thank her enough for this.

Our daughter is in a safe, loving , environment where she is free to explore and learn, allowing my husband and I time to pursue interests of our own in our careers. For us this is a great balance. There was a time I was extremely reserved about sending her somewhere while I was far away from our home but I couldn’t be happier with our decision to send her to daycare.

Are/were your kids in daycare? What was your experience like?

Catherine

plungedindebt.com

How Do You Control Money Given To Your Kids?

January 7, 2015 | 2 Comments

In the past people have given money to our daughter. Sometimes there was explicit direction given with the money, like deposit it in her savings account, and other times there I have been told to spend it on whatever she wants or needs and so my husband and I have gone out and done just that. Usually putting the money towards a need more than a want, she’s only 2.5, she doesn’t have many wants.

Now that she’s getting older though I will be allowing her to make some decision about how her money is designated. While I fully expect the first few times to be about buying the latest toy, it won’t stop me from explain the importance of saving some money too. If she does, great, if she doesn’t- it is her money.

Money to Be Saved

As she gets older I will stress the importance of saving more, but with some exceptions. Any income earned, like if she gets a babysitting job or part-time work doing something fun, I will fully expect that she contributes to her savings account and help save for something larger she may want or need, however I have no problem with allowing gift money to be spent however she wants.

Money to Be Enjoyed

Most money given as a present is expected to be enjoyed. While I would like if she saved some or all of it I have no problem if she decided to blow it all on clothes, toys or whatever else she wanted as she gets older. AS long as it is an informed decision.

If she empties her cash in a mall food court and couldn’t tell me where the money went, I’d have a problem but it would be 100% her mistake to make. If she convinced me she really wants something, and was given the money to buy something, I will totally allow it. At the same time if I notice after some time it’s something she isn’t using or was wasted money, depending on what it was, I would encourage her to sell it and regain some of the lost money.

It’s easy for me as a personal finance blogger to get all too excited about saving and keeping all money tight to the vest but I can’t forget that money is meant to be enjoyed. For a three year old, long-term savings isn’t quite as fun as the newest Elsa doll or Olivia book and I get that, as long as she is really enjoys it isn’t money wasted in my eyes.

I fully expect my children to make mistakes with their money. Mistakes made are often the best learning opportunities. I just hope most of the mistakes are made in the comfort of our family home before she moves out and has a full plate of financial responsibilities. Financial peace is about balancing wants, needs and responsibility as long as I can instill this, she should be just fine.

How do you decide how gift money given to your kids is ”spent”?

Catherine

plungedindebt.com

Sleeping, Outings and Other Tips to Remember During Potty Training

November 19, 2014 | Leave a Comment

In case you missed it:

Post one: Preparing to Potty Train a Toddler

Post two: Potty Training a Toddler in Less Than One Week

Like everything else, do what you feel is best for your child when it comes to outings and bedtime (or naps). I chose to keep our daughter in a diaper for naps and overnight the first few days but reminded her we only used the potty now. After she awoke from all naps and bedtime dry for four days straight and we got rid of diapers for sleep by day five when she woke us up in the morning by yelling ‘’I have to go pee’’.

Starting the second day we left the house in her new underwear driving to daycare. I always make sure she goes potty immediately before leaving the house (wherever we’re going) and we’re usually good to go for a while. In the beginning I made sure to ask her every few minutes if she had to pee and even if she said no, would attempt every 30-45 minutes (where the travel seat comes into play). Now, three weeks into it, I just trust she’ll tell me.

Since day two we have had almost no accidents and the two accidents we did have were my fault, she told me she needed to go and I didn’t get to her fast enough.

Things to remember about potty training:

There will be accidents, when they happen make sure the child knows it’s no big deal. We don’t need them feeling any sort of shame.
The first day I felt like I was making little to no progress initially with the amount of accidents but after nap and starting afternoon there was only one accident and going 30 minutes plus between potty time!
Every child is different and unique. I ‘’just knew’’ my daughter was ready so it was an easier transition. She has been ready for a few months now but I didn’t have the patience to do it until recently.
If you child has alternative childcare make sure they are aware of your potty training plan and will be able to stick to the plan. For us, I requested she stay in underwear all day and go to potty at least every 15 minutes to start. Every day I would let her sitter know how the day would go and we stayed in constant contact throughout the day.
Trust your instincts. If you don’t feel like your 18-24 month old child is ready despite the books suggesting they should be, don’t worry about it. They will get there, give it time.
Spend time getting to know your child’s bathroom signals. My daughter has always been shy about going #2 and fought doing it on the potty a bit, almost as if she would get in trouble, but since I recognized the physical cues she gave, I didn’t let her off the potty until she went. After she did this two to three times she realized it wasn’t a big deal and was fine to go.
Make use of public washrooms or allow them to see you go so they get used to them and so they know they’re ‘’not scary’’ as the loud flush can scare some kids.

Potty training can be very challenging but taking time to prepare yourself and your child will make your life much easier.

Did you use any special tricks when potty training?

Catherine

plungedindebt.com

What to Keep in the Car for a Toddler

November 12, 2014 | Leave a Comment

I love my daughter.

I feel like I need to get that out there when I discuss her behaviour at times. She is an amazing kid when she’s in situations where she’s expected to be just that, a kid. When we put our otherwise perfectly behaved two-year-old in situations where we expect her to suddenly act like an adult and different from the free spirt she usually is, we’re (surprise, surprise) often faced with backlash.

Two is a bit of an awkward age. She knows and understands so much about her world. She talks to me and has opinions about things yet she doesn’t exactly know how to control herself all the time. She gets frustrated sometimes and isn’t quite at the age of being able to tell me exactly what’s going on. She doesn’t understand why we’re always telling her she has to walk (and that we’re not carrying her) but that when in the grocery store we won’t let her walk freely as we do 97% of the time and thus can have mini freak-outs about being contained to the cart. Getting anything done with a toddler can be an experience but with a few preparations it doesn’t always have to be a stress-filled outing.

Food

I’ve never met a kid who didn’t like to eat. My daughter will do just about anything for food. I don’t leave the house without a purse full of snacks. I especially prefer things there are multiple of, things that take longer to eat than just one cracker sort of thing. I like stuff like dry cereal, raisins, fresh fruit cut up, cheese cubed and popcorn. Unlike adults who throw foods by the handful in their mouth, a toddler will each the popcorn one kernel at a time which, in turn buys you time to get your errand done!

Picture Books

I also have books when we go out, there are a few books that live in our vehicle so I’m not looking for them every day. Specifically I like look and find picture books with busy pages so we can talk about multiple things without getting bored (think: show me something red, where are the balloons, what is the boy holding). The types of books that can elicit a lot of different conversations are the best. Never bring books with removable parts because they will get lost.

Necessities

This goes without saying but make sure you always have extra diapers, wipes, potty’s and a change of clothes. I can’t very well expect much in terms of behaviour when she needs the bathroom but still scared of public washrooms, or spills a drink all down her shirt and now uncomfortable. Sometimes managing the basics are all we need.

We love our little balls of energy but sometimes when we need to get stuff done they can be a little difficult to deal with! Though it sometimes takes a little additional planning when leaving the house for an extended period of time, having distraction vices for the kiddo can be a life saver!

What are your favorite way to keep kiddo occupied while out and about?

Catherine

plungedindebt.com

Potty Train in Less than a Week: Your Step-by-Step Guide

November 5, 2014 | Leave a Comment

Now that you’re ready with all the supplies and have mentally prepared yourself for what could be an uphill battle, I will share with you the step-by-step process I used to potty train my two-year-old in less than a week.

Set aside a day

Some things I read suggested setting aside a weekend or upwards of a week alone at home with the child, for me I decided to set aside a single day where there was zero distractions, just her and I to get acquainted with the new potty. I picked a day I had off and knew we wouldn’t have visitors or anything to interrupt our day. Leading up to the day I started talking about the potty and how she was soon going to learn how to use it.

When the day arrived I informed her that after mommy showered and she ate her breakfast we would be hanging out and spending time learning how to use the potty (ideally you can do this before kiddo wakes up so you’re ready as soon as they wake).

When the time came, I removed her diaper and sat her on the potty to pee. Once she did we put on a new pair of underwear which we both got really excited about. I told her when the panties were on we couldn’t pee in them like she did with a diaper and we would now be using the potty only for all pee and poo. Though she agreed with me I expected there to still be accidents, and there was, initially.

For this first day I chose to keep her in a shirt and underwear only. We stayed very close to the bathroom all day and only did simple activities like read books, color and play with toys. No TV, movies or interactive games that have the potential to ‘’suck them in’’ as we need them to be aware of their bodily functions and don’t want a fit when we tear them away from the activity.

Set a time

I used my loud kitchen timer and set it for every 10 minutes. When the timer went off we both got really excited and yelled ‘’it’s potty time!!!’’. We ran to the bathroom as she sat on the toilet. The time will need to be adjusted. I started with 10 minutes but she was peeing a little every six or so minutes so I decreased the time from 10 to 5 for about an hour then started increasing it by 5 minutes once we had an hour with no accidents going every 10 minutes. Because I was making her drink a lot more than normal (to encourage the pee) she was able to pee even a tiny bit every time I put her on the toilet. For this we both got really excited and if I thought she needed it, I’d give her a treat, 90% of the time be clapping was enough reward for her.

By the end of the first day we were going 30 minutes between potty times and she was starting to tell me she had to go potty without the timer.

By the second day we had one accident only at daycare, dry nap. Treats stopped today for us but you may need to continue them.

Day three, still potty every 15-25 minutes per our reminder and zero accidents, dry nap. Accident free two-hour outing.

Day four she was telling us when she needed, if she hadn’t gone in 40 minutes, we remind her. She started waking in the morning telling us she needed to wake up and pee.

Day five, still no accidents on her vocalizing when she needs to go only. By this point she is also climbing onto the toilet and mastered taking her pants and underwear off 100% solo.

Day six onwards- zero accidents, all naps dry, dry overnight, no issue when travelling and running errands.

Keep everyone in the loop!

If you child has alternative childcare make sure they are aware of your potty training plan and will be able to stick to the plan. I let the daycare know everything I was doing so the next day she could pick up where I left off. For us, I requested she stay in underwear all day and go to potty at least every 15 minutes to start. Everyday I would let her sitter know how the day would go and we stayed in constant contact throughout the day.

Potty training is very individual, these are the steps I used to get started with potty training. Next week I will discuss the steps I used for outings and naptime as well extra tips to remember!

Catherine

plungedindebt.com

How I Prepared to Potty Train My Toddler

October 29, 2014 | Leave a Comment

I’ve been thinking about how to approach potty training with my two year old for months. It’s funny, motherhood relies a lot on intuition but potty training was leaving me stumped. I mean how do you teach a small child how to just stop using a diaper and start using a potty (or toilet)?

Today I am discussing how I prepared to potty train, next week I will break down my step-by-step about how I had my daughter from diapers to full-time underwear (including overnight) in less than a week.

Mentally Prepare Yourself

I knew one thing for sure, regardless of how I was going to approach it, I wasn’t going to initiate anything until I was ready. Most things I read focused on the readiness of the child but in my mind I was mentally preparing myself for what could be a struggle and mommy needed to be prepared more than child. If mom (and/or dad) isn’t on board do not attempt anything until you are. Once you start potty training do not stop, so if there will be foreseeable interruptions (vacations, large life changes), wait. Children are much more flexible than we give them credit for sometimes.

Get the Right Supplies

I chose to use a toilet seat insert over that traditional child potty since I felt like it was saving a step with the lack of transition needed between potty and regular, large toilet. My niece was taught on a child potty and is still terrified of toilets, especially in public, so I was going to do what I could to avoid this. I bought the seat months before I started so she could see it and become familiar with what it was though I don’t think this is a necessary step. Use whatever is easiest for you and your family.
I bought new underwear for her to see and get acquainted with, they were her ‘’big girl undies’’. Though I didn’t have her present when I bought them, I can see how some children would be excited to be involved with this step and may be beneficial, use your own judgement.
Buy a travel potty seat insert if you plan on going in public! Their bladders are small and when they need to go they need to go! Some public toilets are larger than residential and falling into the toilet even once will be enough for you and them I’m sure. The travel seats I’ve seen fold up to the size of a change pad and are pretty cheap (less than $15.00).
Rewards, if using, need to be on hand. Again this is child dependant. Before I started I knew if it came down to it my child would do just about anything for a Smartie or M&M so I had a few on hand, if I needed. I chose to not start with much reward in the beginning and see how it worked out. As I suspected my daughter was excited to just have me clap and be proud of her, she didn’t need a chocolate treat or sticker but again, have whatever you think you child will need for encouragement, on hand.
An audible timer. This could also likely be an app on a smartphone but something that makes a noise loud enough for you and child to hear.

Because I was prepared mentally for the worst, you can imagine my elation for how easy the process actually was for us. Though I mentioned mom (and dad) being mentally prepared it goes without saying to check for readiness with your child as well. There is no ‘’perfect’’ age to potty train. Every child is unique and for some being potty trained at 18 months is do-able where others are past their third birthday. You know your child better than anyone or any expert, unless there is a time sensitive issue (passing fourth birthday and needs to be out of diapers for pre-school), don’t rush the process!

Catherine

plungedindebt.com

The Best Smiles in Life are Free

October 15, 2014 | Leave a Comment

It’s been a while since I was actually in a McDonald’s restaurant, but I vividly remember the old menus growing up that, at the very end said, ‘’Smiles are always free’’. My experience in being a mom is that the best smiles are, in fact, free but that doesn’t stop me as a parent from chasing the need to see my child smiling through my unnecessary purchases.

I don’t even realize I’m doing it most of the time. Last weekend I had to go to a local big box store for an item. I was there to return something, that was it. I had no intentions of even walking around the store but when I realized I had some freedom (I was alone, no kid, no husband), I decided to capitalize on my few free moments and wander through the aisles. Given that I actually hate shopping, and am very much someone who likes to accomplish as much as possible in any given day, it was out of character for me to even want to do this, but I did.

I was scoping out the newest stuff and staring in disbelief at all the Christmas stuff that was already out, as Halloween hasn’t even passed, when I found myself walking through the book aisle. Again, innocently browsing at what was there, I instantly picked up a book with my daughters favorite character’s on it. The thought process was something like this:

‘’I need to buy this for her! She will love it and put a big smile on her face when she sees it!!’’.

At $3.50 I wasn’t breaking the bank but, though I didn’t realize it at the time, I was doing it selfishly. Though the book was for her, the book was more for me. For me, as her mom, to see her eyes light up and smile when I hand it to her.

It wasn’t until after I gave her the book when I realized what I had done. Though she was appreciative of the gesture, and thanked me for it, what she really wanted and what really got her excited was me. I had been away from her for a few hours and she wouldn’t care if I had a 10 pound chocolate bunny in my arm, she was just excited to see me and go back to mommy-daughter play time.

When I really think about it, the biggest smiles and reactions are never from when we give her something, be it a special after dinner treat or new book, it’s from when we’re sharing time together, building forts on the floor and hiding from invisible monsters, when we’re in a tickle fight or coloring a picture together. Though I will still buy things for her, I won’t buy something with the selfish intention of seeking out a smile because I know in my heart I have it in me to make her smile bigger than any object.

Catherine

plungedindebt.com

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